
Connect The Dots B*tch
By Amy Fiedler
Amy is a Certified Trauma Support Specialist, Holistic Life Coach and Reiki Master Practitioner. If you are searching for understanding of yourself and others in your life, this podcast is for you.

Connect The Dots B*tchSep 18, 2023

Secure Relationship Secrets
Amy gives you a look inside a secure relationship from the perspective of someone who has experienced trauma from past abusive relationship. She offers you (5) insider tips to help you become aware of and normalize what you can expect to occur within a secure attachment. She also shares solutions on how to navigate conflict and confusion in the most supportive way!
THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES:
- Secure attachments
- Healthy conflict resolution
- Emotional management
- Trauma triggers
- Boundary Setting
- Personal stories from Amy
- Personal life updates from Amy
If you're enjoyed this episode or past Connect The Dots B*tch episodes, leave Amy a 5-star review on Apple or Spotify! Be sure to share this episode with your partner, friend or family member who may need this insight as well.

The One About Ghosting
Amy provides you a full rundown of what 'ghosting' is, what people commonly confuse it to be, why people ghost and how to cope with being ghosted! She offers you real-life examples of being ghosting, deconstructs what is happening for the ghost-er and ghost-ee and her expertise on how harmful and abusive this behavior can be.
THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES:
- Ghosting
- Ghosting while dating
- Ghosting while in a committed relationship
- What does NOT constitute ghosting
- Abandonment fears
- How to cope with being ghosted
- Why you feel haunted by having been ghosting and can't move through the pain
- Practical steps for coping with being ghosted
- What to work on if you're wanting to ghost

A New Phase of Life
Amy announces some big changes in her life, answers a few FAQs and shares how she's navigating it all, what she's prioritizing and how she's finding a healthy balance. She offers you key points and takeaways that not only pertain to what she's going through, but how they may connect to you and your life and relationships.
THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES:
- A big life update from Amy!
- What needs are always important to prioritize, especially through life changes.
- Prenatal + childhood trauma
- Planning for the future
- Trauma triggers and emotional triggers
- Acknowledging your personal growth
- Amy's personal reflections on her own growth, old behavior patterns + how she's learning to be more flexible within these new life experiences!

Do You Need to Have an Honest Conversation?
Amy shares a quick life update about her recent travels and the "adventure" (re: disaster) that occurred on the way back home. She discusses how to approach having an honest conversation with someone, even if that individual is incapable or unwilling. You'll hear her deconstruct why sometimes we are uncomfortable in relationship to others (hint: their behavior may not align with our truth) and provides you clear insight and practical steps in navigating the nuances of difficult relationships!
THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES:
- Life update from Amy!
- Honest, transparent conversations
- Navigating other people's dysregulated states
- Setting a boundary with someone who is dismissive.
- Difficult relationships
- Staying true to yourself in spite of how others behave
- Communicating to move through confilct.

The One About Healthy Conflict Resolution
Amy breaks down the necessary steps of navigating conflict in a healthy and supportive way. She discusses in depth the challenges many face, the steps most skip and how a history of trauma can impact your willingness and awareness to take these steps.
THIS EPISODE WILL DISCUSS:
- The tangible steps to healthy conflict resolution in any type of relationship.
- Common conflict triggers + trauma triggers.
- Common struggles for trauma survivors in navigating conflict.
- What signs indicate your relationship is stuck + conflict cannot be resolved.
- The importance of repairing after conflict.
In this episode, Amy mentions a helpful guide called Identifying Your Trauma Triggers which you can access and download here.

What Does Healing Look Like?
In this episode, Amy answers the question, 'what does healing really look like?' With so much misinformation online, Amy discusses the nuances on the topic of trauma healing. Tune in to hear her debunk myths, identify misconceptions and educate you further on what works, what doesn't, what is clickbait online and what the overall truth is about healing from trauma!
THIS EPISODE WILL DISCUSS:
- Myths, misconceptions + misguided information about trauma healing.
- Will safe people and environments trigger you?
- Does being alone (or single) safeguard you from pain?
- Will you still get triggered after trauma?
- What will trigger you after trauma? Understanding trauma triggers.
- Therapy? What works and what doesn't.
- + much more!
If these podcast episodes are educating, entertaining and providing you value, please take a moment to leave Amy a 5-star review on Apple or Spotify! For access to Amy's resources, downloads and on-demand courses, go to amyfiedler.com .

Kute Blackson: Self-Trust, Freedom + The Magic of Surrender
Kute Blackson is a beloved inspirational speaker and transformational teacher. He speaks at countless events he organizes around the world as well as at outside events including A-Fest, YPO (Young Presidents’ Organization), and EO (Entrepreneurs’ Organization). He is a member of the Transformational Leadership Council, a select group of one hundred of the world’s foremost authorities in the personal development industry. Winner of the 2019 Unity New Thought Walden Award, Blackson is widely considered a next generation leader in the field of personal development. His mission is simple: To awaken and inspire people across the planet to access inner freedom, live authentically and fulfill their true life’s purpose.
THIS EPISODE WILL DISCUSS:
- Kute's personal journey to becoming an inspirational speaker + transformational teacher.
- the importance of self-trust.
- choosing your authentic truth over the plan someone else mapped out for you.
- difficult conversations (with parents).
- how following the nudging of your soul brings freedom!
- a balanced + nuanced look at what surrendering is.
- choosing to view life as a miracle in spite of hardships.
- Kute's book, "The Magic of Surrender" + what you can expect from it!
FOLLOW + CONNECT WITH KUTE:
Purchase your copy of Kute's book, The Magic of Surrender on Amazon: www.amazon.com/Magic-Surrender-Finding-Courage-Let/dp/0593189094
Check out how to work with Kute at www.kuteblackson.com
Check out Kute's Bali Breakthrough Experience at www.boundlessblissbali.com SOCIAL MEDIA: Facebook: www.facebook.com/kuteblacksonlovenow
Instagram: www.instagram.com/kuteblackson
Twitter: www.twitter.com/kuteblackson
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/kuteblackson09

Being “The Mature One”

Triangulation
Amy discusses what triangulation is, how challenging it can be to navigate and real-life examples of how she does it! She deconstructs this form of abuse and manipulation to make it digestible and help you understand how it presents itself in relationships.
THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES:
- What triangulation can look and sound like.
- Real-life examples of experiencing triangulation within a family.
- How to navigate and what practical coping methods can you use for triangulation.
- Life updates from Amy!
- Insecurities
- Boundary Setting
- Toxic family dynamics
Amy's brand-new online course for The Supportive People to Trauma Survivors has now launched and is mentioned in this episode of Connect The Dots B*tch! If you are navigating a challenging relationship with someone who may or may not be aware of their own trauma, this course is for you. If you are a trauma survivor wanting to be more supportive without losing yourself or needing others to behave and communicate in more supportive ways, this course is for you. Use code OGLISTENER for 10% off your purchase today: The Course for the Supportive People to Trauma Survivors | Amy Fiedler (teachable.com)

Are Triggers Caused By Others?
Amy sits down to discuss how trauma and triggers are created and if it is in fact by other people! She deconstructs how to tell the difference between if your trauma is being triggered or if the person and the behavior is actually harmful to you.
THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES:
- how trauma and triggers are created
- why we cope by blaming others
- healthier ways to cope
- how to tell the difference between if it's your trauma being triggered or it's actually harmful behavior.
- why we find it easier to blame others
- how to stop swinging the pendulum too far one way with binary ways of thinking and coping.
- childhood trauma becoming adulthood trauma
- the supportive tools you need for your triggers and your coping

Parental Modeling
Amy discusses the impact a parent or guardian’s modeling has on their children. How we aren’t just influenced by how we’re treated, but also by how those adults treat themselves and others.
This episode discusses:
- Emotional neglect, immaturity, abuse
- Parental modeling
- Generational trauma
- Breaking generational patterns
- Common mistakes and flawed beliefs about childhood trauma.
- Personal stories from Amy's life and how she copes and has healed.
If you enjoyed this episode or past episodes of Connect The Dots B*tch, leave Amy a 5-star review on Apple or Spotify to let us know! If this episode helped you, share it with a friend!

Post Traumatic Growth

Shiadanni: A Fusion of Pain, Growth and Healing Through Creative Expression
THIS EPISODE WILL DISCUSS:
- the healing properties of creative expression
- the frustrations of being misperceived
- creating healthy outlets for your anger
- the fusion of pain, healing and growth through music and comedy
- self-acceptance
- creating a language with your fans
- conforming vs. redefining success
- feeling misunderstood
- finding yourself late in life
FOLLOW + CONNECT WITH SHIADANNI:
Stream 'Stellar' new single out: shiadanni.ffm.to/stellarLook out for the upcoming single: 'Violent'
INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/shiadanniTIKTOK: www.tiktok.com/@shiadanniYOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/@ShiadanniFACEBOOK: www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100077408037756

Seek To Understand, Not Attack
This episode discusses:
- Emotional mismanagement
- Mental/emotional boundaries
- Emotional maturity
- Productive, healthy ways to navigate people's unnecessary projections/reactions

The Challenge of Mental + Emotional Boundaries
Episode discusses:
- Mental + Emotional Boundaries
- Being highly sensitive
- Why most people struggle with 'unseen' boundaries.
- How to 'mind your business' and not allow other people's struggles to consume you.
If you're enjoying Connect The Dots B*tch, please leave a 5-start review on Apple or Spotify and click Subscribe!

Deison Afualo: Body Neutrality, Having Supportive Family, Breakups + Her 'Thank You Next' Era
THIS EPISODE WILL DISCUSS:
- growing up in a healthy, supportive family environment
- how mental health struggles aren't always rooted in childhood
- navigating a breakup
- being in her 'Thank You Next' Era
- mental health struggles
- body neutrality + healing the relationship to your body
- practical steps for improving your self-esteem and self-worth
- what a successful, supportive family does to maintain their connection
- setting boundaries around social media and the harm of media consumption
FOLLOW + CONNECT WITH DEISON:
Deison will be attending VidCon 2023 as a speaker in June! Hear her speak and have a chance to meet her by grabbing your ticket to VidCon here: www.vidcon.com/anaheim
INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/deisonafualo
TIKTOK: www.tiktok.com/@deisonafualo
STREAM 'Two Idiot Girls' Podcast: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-idiot-girls/id1554406108
STREAM 'Two Hot Takes' Podcast: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-hot-takes/id1553199104

Rebuilding Self-Trust
In this week's episode, Amy deconstructs self-trust. She asks you to reflect on if you ever really had trust in yourself to begin with? Were you truly connected to the choices you were making in life and understanding of their value or were you disconnected and choosing what was modeled and taught to you. If you've ever felt a lack of self-trust or are trying to rebuild trust with yourself (or with others), this episode is for you! For more support on identifying your values and rebuilding that self-trust, as mentioned in the episode, enroll in: The Course for Trauma Survivors Setting Boundaries | amy-fiedler.teachable.com/p/trauma-survivors-setting-boundaries This episode discusses self-trust, trust issues, healthy boundaries, childhood trauma, parenting, self-neglect, and rebuilding trust with others.

Noble Gibbens: Emotionally Clueless to EQ Gangster

Trauma Triggers While In The Healthy Relationship

Small Problems to Big Problems

Your Brain is Hardwired For The Negative

What Growth Looks Like

Be Kind To Your Nervous System

Whose Voice Is That?

The Foundation of a Safe Relationship

Identifying Your Trauma Triggers

The Stigma of Anger

Trauma Triggers I Healed After Entering a Safe Relationship

The Boundaries My Partner Sets with Me, a Trauma Survivor

Moving Through The Triggers + Healing The Wounds

Cultivating An Honest Relationship

Setting Realistic Expectations Around Emotional Healing

Turning Your Pain Into Power

Family Obligations + Holiday Challenges

Peaceful Influences + Overstepped Boundaries

Lessons I Learned After Trauma

Are You Doing To Others What You Don’t Want Done To You?

The Formula For Finding Balance

Examining The Environmental Triggers

The Anatomy of Insecurity

The Lost Pieces of Your Inner Child

Perfectionism + Self-Doubt

The Missing Step That’s Keeping You Stuck

Trauma INFORMED!

The Ways We Emotionally Protect Ourselves

Talking About Your Trauma with a New Partner

Babysitting With Amy: PART TWO

How Do The Green Flags Protect You?

The One for Partners to Trauma Survivors
