Children of Scientology presents: The Lighthouse Project Podcast

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production. 

In our last episode, we were joined by Liz Gale, as we highlighted pieces from the closing statements by the prosecution in the Danny Masterson trial.

Deputy DA's Ariel Anson and Reinhold Mueller both shone a spotlight on Scientology as an organization that does not allow its members to report to law enforcement, where the victims are punished and the perpetrators are protected.

As Deputy DA Ariel Anson put it, what a better hunting ground. In this episode, Christi and Mirriam continue the conversation, breaking down the ways in which Scientology really is a perfect hunting ground for predators, where there are no conventional protections in place for children.

We discuss the ways that Scientology continues to shift and evolve to evade actions against them in the court system, that they continue to prevent justice for victims, and what those of us who were raised in it are doing to change this.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production. 

In our last episode with Danielle Ballou, we took a look at the testimony of Jennifer Ferencz, a criminologist at LAPD in forensic science, and toxicology. We discussed drugs that are used in the facilitation of sexual assault, symptomology, and why it is important to understand the wide range of effects these drugs can have. A good indicator that a person's drink has been spiked is if their symptoms are not consistent with what they knew to have consumed. We discussed some prevention and protection tactics and ways that a victim can be better supported in the event that this occurs. 

In this episode, we are joined by Liz Gale, a badass third-generation Scientologist. Liz appeared in season two, episode three of Leah Remini; Scientology and the Aftermath. She has garnered a substantial following on TikTok and has recently published her first book titled Confessions of an Ex-Scientologist Pothead. Liz is recognized for her relatable humor, strong spirit, and honesty with which she talks about her personal experiences.

Together, we highlight pieces from the closing statements by the prosecution in the Danny Masterson trial and as always, we share pieces along the way from our own journeys so that we may continue to shed light on the abusive practices of Scientology.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production. 

In our last episode with Danielle Ballou, we finished reading from the testimony of Jane Doe 2. This provided us with greater insight and understanding regarding some of her experiences within Scientology and the ways in which this affected and impacted her.

We acknowledge Jane Doe 2 for her strength and bravery in her pursuit of justice. And we reflect on our own experiences of growing up in Scientology.

In this episode, Danielle Ballou joins us once again. This time, we take a look at the testimony of Jennifer Ferencz, a criminologist at LAPD in forensic science, toxicology. 

Danny Masterson overpowered his victims by causing them to ingest an unknown substance, which would incapacitate them. So that the jury may hear facts about drugs used to facilitate sexual assault and understand more about their symptomology, the prosecution called Jennifer Ferencz, who has fifteen years of experience in toxicology.

We dive into some of the history of the more well-known drugs used to facilitate sexual assault as well as other substances, including prescription medication.

We discuss symptomology and why it is so important to understand the wide range of potential effects of these substances.

We also stress that a good indicator that a person's drink was spiked, is whether the symptoms presented are consistent with what the person knew to have consumed.

We discuss some prevention and protection tactics and ways that a victim can be better supported in the event that this occurs.

Our aim is to be informative about this topic and so we cover a variety of facts and information in this episode. 

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Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production. In our last episode, we were joined by Danielle Ballou who grew up in Scientology, as we continued with the testimony of Jane Doe 2. We noticed that Jane Doe 2 described Danny Masterson as being very commanding, that he was giving directives, not accepting her refusals, and repeating his commands. It seemed quite familiar to us, so we dove into the Upper Indoctrination TRS: training drills that teach a person to be able to control someone else's body, to make a person obey their commands, despite resistance; the same training that Danny Masterson had completed. We also talked about the fear tactics and dangerous methods by which Scientology steers people away from getting real, beneficial, and necessary help. Christi and Victoria shared their positive experiences and observations on mental health treatments. This episode is the second half of our chat with Danielle Ballou, in which we finish reading from the testimony of Jane Doe 2. We understand more about how Jane Doe 2 is impacted by the Scientology handling of the earlier rape that she experienced, and how this affected her, including causing her to not report to law enforcement immediately following the rape by Danny Masterson. In her testimony, Jane Doe 2 defines OL (Opinion Leader) and says that it is a person of high status, who is valuable to Scientology. She states that if you are an OL, you have value to the church and they protect you. We discuss that in reporting on fellow Scientologists, some people are protected and others aren't, and that by writing a report you could become a target for investigation. We find ourselves reflecting back on some of our experiences growing up in Scientology. We relate to the difficulties of social connection and intimacy after leaving Scientology. We discuss the decimation of friendships, disappearing kids and never being allowed to say goodbye, the purposeful isolation and punishments which were designed to make us stay in the Sea Org, and the painful reality of parental betrayal in the cover-up of crimes.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production. 

In our last episode, we began our discussion with expert witness, Claire Headley, in relation to the testimony that she gave when she was called to the stand by the prosecution in the Danny Masterson trial, to answer questions about the policies and practices of Scientology.

We examined some of the aspects of Scientology, which by design trap and systematically continue to confine a person, keeping any potential resources out of reach and further preventing them from getting help. 

In this second part of our chat with Claire, we focus on the system of Scientology, including channels of communication and reporting, types of reports, and the collection and management of information on a mass scale. 

We define three separate computerized systems, the type of information they contain, who they are accessible to, and how that information is used, including against members on public internet hate sites created to discredit members who leave and speak out about the abuses they experienced and witnessed. Meanwhile, when records requests are made by authorities/courts, Scientology denies maintaining extemporaneous records on members, or claim protection by priest-penitent privilege, even from members themselves, and members confessions are the sole property of Scientology. We acknowledge the impacts that Claire Headley has had through providing the facts on Scientology's policies and practices in this trial and beyond that, her efforts which have helped to expose the abuses of Scientology.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production.

In our last episode, we took a look at the testimony of expert witness, Claire Headley, who was called to the stand by the prosecution in the Danny Masterson trial, to answer questions about the policies and practices of Scientology.

Through her testimony, Claire described aspects of the Scientology ethics and justice system, including methods of internal reporting. She confirmed that members are disallowed to report crimes to outside authorities or suffer Scientology penalties.

In this episode, Claire Headley joins us to talk about her experience of giving that testimony. We are so pleased to have the opportunity to dive a little deeper with her and shed more light on this insular system, in which each of us grew up in.

We discuss the structures and confines, which by design kept us quiet, controlled, and trapped, and some of the turning points in our stories.

We talk about the needs of a victim, that they must first feel safe before they can begin to really process what has happened to them, and we reflect on the process of getting out of this high control group, with emphasis on the necessity of access to basic and essential resources.

We touch on the incredible value of the public platforms survivors are now using to help spread awareness, as well as tell their own story in their own way, in full or in part, vs the selective and very limited opportunities we have navigated until now.

We compare notes on each of our decisions to step forward and share our stories, and reflect on what a personal decision this is for each person, that they must make on their own, once they're ready, and they feel safe enough to do so.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production.

In this episode, we focus on the expert testimony of Claire Headley, who was born and raised in Scientology. At the age of sixteen, she was thrust into the Religious Technology Centre, and eventually became one of the top executives in Scientology, just beneath David Miscavige, Scientology's current leader. 

We relate to the triggering language Deputy Attorney Ariel Anson asks Claire to define, "victim", "handling" and good standing" and relate to our own experiences being intimidated by them as children. 

Christi shares her mother's obsessive self-policing, writing reports on herself, when struggling, after achieving the highest processing level of Scientology at that time- Operating Thetan 7- but not experiencing the promised life improvements, unable to support herself, and her children, instead spiraling into psychosis. 

Victoria recalls her brother insulting her by calling her a "victim's advocate" when she believed a child victim who claimed Victoria's brother had had inappropriate contact with her. 

Claire describes Scientology justice, and confirms members are disallowed to report crimes to outside authorities, or suffer Scientology penalties, including being ex-communicated, and declared a suppressive person. 

We read from a Non Enturbulation Order (gag order) issued on a second generation member, raised in the Sea Organization, who spent many years on its prison program, the Rehabilitation Project Force, before he was ultimately declared Suppressive. 

We share how honored, and excited we are that Claire Headley will be a guest on our next episode. We hope you'll tune in. 

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production.

This episode includes descriptions and graphic details of rape as we read from a leaked internal letter Jane Doe 1's mother wrote to Scientology leader, David Miscavige, as she tries to escalate "handling" Danny Masterson's rape of her daughter, using Scientology's own incredibly detailed notes from interrogations of Danny Masterson, and Luke Watson and their changing stories.

In Scientology speak, she explains her understanding of what happened to her daughter, being forced to accept blame, and being sold very expensive "security checks" (metered interrogations) so that she could take full responsibility for her violent rape, and near-death experience. She was angered by what she perceived as mishandling of the reported rape, and requested David Miscavige put a stop to the actions taken by Scientology officials, which she described as "squirrelly"; not in line with standard technology, and not a correct use of Scientology practices. 

We compare the tv docu-series "Shiny Happy People" to Scientology, reflect on Scientology as a system, confining its members to its own language, and internal procedures, in which you must refer to the policy before offering an opinion, where the individual's voice is reduced and restricted, and how this comes through in this letter. We draw on our experiences of the effects of Scientology's practices on the inhibition of emotion and our lack of awareness of our personal boundaries and rights.  Jane Doe 1's mother hasn't realized yet, this is the way that Scientology treats crimes - victims are blamed & punished, not perpetrators. Her adherence to Scientology keeps her in this closed system rather than involving law enforcement or providing testimony in this trial. Thanks to this letter, we now understand more of Scientology's continued efforts to threaten, silence, and control Jane Doe 1, and how David Miscavige was fully involved and aware.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production.

In this episode, we continue our discussion about testimony of Jane Doe 1 who was born into Scientology, as she described what happened after she first reported that Danny Masterson had raped her and the very specific and controlled actions she went through in an attempt to change her understanding of what happened, to force her to accept blame, and to take responsibility for what had happened to her. We continue learning about what Jane Doe 1 went through and how the situation escalated to involve more Scientology officials after Jane Doe 1's mother wrote a letter to the leader, David Miscavige urging him to step in and take action. We understand more of what Jane Doe 1 was up against and how tenacious she was in her persistence for justice and how the Scientology continued their attempts to threaten, silence and control her.

We discuss the meaning of a non-enturbulation order and Mirriam shares her own personal experience with having been put under one at fifteen years old, disconnection and the threat of disconnection as well as the parent-child relationship in Scientology. We draw on some stories from our own lives. 

Victoria relates to Jane Doe 1's testimony of endless interrogations and tells her heartbreaking story of her experience as a child while undergoing these same actions. We discuss what Scientology sells and what it actually delivers and the ultimate impact that it can have on people's lives. 

We draw correlation between the Jane Doe's testimonies in this trial and other cases, which Amanda and Christi read to us from articles. We hear the same patterns, the same words and the same tools used against these victims by Scientology. 

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production.

In our last episode, we focused on the expert witness testimony of Dr. Barbara Ziv who is a forensic psychiatrist specializing in sexual assault. She talked about the common myths and misconceptions that relate to sexual assault and rape and the counterintuitive ways that a victim might react. She emphasized that most instances of sexual assault are done by someone known to the victim. 

In this, our fifth episode, we continue our examination of Dr. Barbara Ziv testimony, covering such topics as reasons a victim might have continued contact with their abuser, why most victims don't report, the gap between belief and the prosecution of a criminal case, the burden of evidence on the victim to support their case, options for reporting, access to support, types of police statements, memory stress impact on statements, the conviction rate of perpetrators and why most of these types of criminal cases don't progress or produce a successful outcome. 

During redirect, Mr. Mueller had asked Dr. Ziv if there were certain date-rape drugs that put you "on the same continuum" (continuing to function, not rendering immobile) and she responded that there were - "whole classes of drugs".

We discuss our own complex incidences of date rape drugging and the confusing effects that we experienced. Victoria, whose drug rape occurred while still in Scientology, shares how it was "handled" by Scientology, so similar to the Jane Does in this trial, where she was also blamed, punished, assigned lower conditions, make amends, and forced to try to "help" her rapists, in order for her to fully take responsibility for "pulling in" what happened to her. She touches on her resulting first suicide attempt, and how Scientology forced her to sign release forms, absolving them, should she succeed.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production.

Our fourth episode is Part 1 of a freeform conversation around expert witness, Dr. Barbara Ziv's testimony and related topics: We begin with a heartfelt thank you to Jane Doe 3, for her tenacity and unwavering bravery. Mirriam reads Dr. Ziv testimony transcript, as she explains some misconceptions around a victim's response. We each relate to our own personal feelings and experiences with domestic violence and sexual assault, the confusion that can exist around it, power dynamics, proximity to the perpetrator, as well as recidivism.

Victoria reflects more on her Scientology "handling" of her sexual abuse.

We all go on a side tangent about Scientology's indoctrination of members to be able to confront anything, via its "Training Routines", and "Bullbaiting", how uncomfortable it felt to us at the time, and reflect on understanding now that it played a role in each of us learning to dissociate as children, and later Victoria’s Dissociative Identity Disorder diagnosis.

We discuss the incredible importance of the brain-body connection, and how we understand now, that Scientology interrupts it in so many way, especially for children.

Christi describes wanting nothing more to do with Scientology when she left at about 20, or appeasing the group, and contrasts that to Mirriam, who was born into the Sea Organization, and Amanda who was born into Scientology since both tried so hard to remain in good standing after leaving the Sea Organization.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production.

Our third episode is Part 2 of a freeform conversation around Jane Doe 3 testimony and topics: We continue relating to Jane Doe 3 testimony, sharing our similar experiences in our own personal Scientology "handlings" as children and young adults.

Mirriam and Christi go further down the rabbit hole of Scientology victim blaming by explaining concepts like "pulling in" abuse, defining "overts & withholds", and "the overt-motivator sequence" and the technique Scientology uses to brainwash victims into believing that they deserve the bad things that have happened to them. Amanda and Victoria speak from personal experience about being forced to 'take responsibility" for their "crimes" (abuses) as children. We open up our copies of the Introduction to Scientology Ethics Book to review some policies and hear a few of Scientology's definitions of "Victim" from its Technical Dictionary, touching on how the reframing of this word has long-term impacts on healing.

We scratch the surface around the Scientology belief that being critical, complaining, or speaking negatively about another always means you have committed crimes against them - and we help each other clarify the "Chaplain Cycle", comparing what we thought it was then to what we understand it to be now as reformed victims looking back on our own abuses.

We conclude that these policies and practices strategically and effectively control how children and victims are allowed to perceive and communicate about the harm they experience, and the very limited resources they are offered by Scientology.

Welcome back to the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology Production.

Our second episode is Part 1 of a freeform conversation around Jane Doe 3 testimony and topics:

Amanda Rae arrives, we introduce ourselves, plus share a little more about why we're each here. We touch on staying "under the radar", some lightbulb moments, and finally letting go of Scientology. We continue our discussion around the Danny Masterson Rape Retrial and relate to Jane Doe 3 testimony.

We dig into Field Auditing and prolonged "security checking" and the blaming of children who experience sexual trauma, what it feels like to be a child at a rural "Org", more on the "Cadet Org" and separation from parents, and how children often reach the conclusion that it hurts less to let their parents go.

We scratch the surface of parallels in our own childhood experiences around the practice of "No HE&R" (no human emotion and reaction), the practice of victim blaming via being made to describe in great detail (and repetitively) how you "pulled in" anything negative that happens to you (even if it means inventing false memories in a past lifetime), more on Scientology euphemisms, and how all of these things strategically and effectively control how children are allowed to feel, process experiences, and are able or unable to communicate about them, plus long term emotional & mental health impacts.

Introducing the Lighthouse Project, a Children of Scientology production.

In our inaugural episode, you'll hear from founders, Mirriam, Christi, and Victoria, all raised in, who define it's purpose, and set a solid foundation for future discussions, offering a compelling glimpse into the experiences of individuals raised within Scientology, and initiating important conversations about mental health, justice, and contradictory messages by Scientology, what they do versus what they say they do. This project is intended to offer an opportunity to discuss the unique experiences of individuals raised in the controversial group. The goals are to create awareness of its impact on children, explore their sense of self, family dynamics, and mental health, find ways to heal, and share tools By providing a platform for dialogue and healing, we hope this is a valuable resource for any interested in understanding the impact of Scientology on its youngest members. An added value lies in its ability to offer a safe space for legacy individuals to share stories and shed light on a lesser-known aspect of Scientology, the children.

By amplifying these voices, we hope our project gives a broader understanding of the impacts of high-control upbringings, offering support and validation for those who've navigated the complexities of leaving or questioning their involvement in the thing they were formed around. Children of Scientology's mission is to raise awareness, create community, and provide support for those who grew up in it.

We intend for this podcast to offer a valuable and unique opportunity to hear more than the typical space opera, outrageous doctrine, and celebrity stories. Instead, giving insight into the unique challenges and dangers faced by children of the organization.

In our first discussion, we turn our attention to the retrial of Danny Masterson, who was raised in Scientology, and has been charged with three counts of forcible rape by the Los Angeles County District Attorney's Office, many of his victims, and witnesses called to testify were also raised in Scientology.

Throughout the course of this trial, we will address various pieces of the victim's testimonies and expert witness testimonies. We'll discuss parallels in our own experiences with Scientology, and its consistent controlling of a victim's narrative, language, emotions, and denial of rights and access to care (including of children) through its systematic control mechanisms.

We wish to bring attention to the details in this case so that we can more deeply understand what the Jane Doe's went through, what they were up against and to gain a sense of what it took for them to get there. We begin this journey with the opening statements.