
Everyone Belongs
By Everyone Belongs

Everyone BelongsMay 25, 2020

19. BE SEEN - The Benefits of Sharing Our Story
Ben and Kami share the beliefs that keep them from sharing their story and the cost of remaining silent. They share about what they learned in therapy and the impact of sharing their story on their podcast and what you can do to share yours.
Quote: “There’s a difference between wanting to be looked at and wanting to be seen. When you are looked at, your eyes can be closed. You suck energy, you steal the spotlight. When you are seen, your eyes must be open, and you are seeing and recognizing your witness. You accept energy and you generate energy. You create light. One is exhibitionism, the other is connection. Not everybody wants to be looked at. Everybody wants to be seen.” ― Amanda Palmer, The Art of Asking; or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Let People Help
LINKS Amanda Palmer's TED Talk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMj_P_6H69g
Kami's Instagram https://www.instagram.com/kamicrawford
FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 5/12/2020

18. Saving our Humanity during a Pandemic: COVID-19
Ben and Kami talk about the impact the coronavirus has had on their travels to the Appalachian Trail and the dangers of separation and judgment that happen when we reduce people and how that can be overcome.
FB Discussion Group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates)
https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts:
https://apple.co/2NMMq1O SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel):
https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations
https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 3/24/2020

17. Being married and no longer believing in monogamy
Ben and Kami talk about what it meant to believe that Jesus had to die for our sins and how this belief started to unravel and what changes it created in their life including how it led to no rules, being vegetarian, and no longer spanking.
LINKS
Things Hidden by Richard Rohr
https://amzn.to/33b7LcC
Liturgists Podcast - Are those people the problem? Peter Rollins Interview
http://bit.ly/39KkENb
Everything Belongs by Ricard Rohr
https://amzn.to/2VLIEeX
The Wisdom Jesus by Cynthia Bourgeault
https://amzn.to/33cgLyd
FB Discussion Group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 3/10/2020

16. Did Jesus die for our sins?
Ben and Kami talk about what it meant to believe that Jesus had to die for our sins and how this belief started to unravel and what changes it created in their life including how it led to no rules, being vegetarian, and no longer spanking.
LINKS
Things Hidden by Richard Rohr
https://www.amazon.com/dp/0867166592/?ref=exp_fightfortogether_dp_vv_d
Liturgists Podcast - Are those people the problem? Peter Rollins Interview https://theliturgists.com/podcast/2020/2/20/are-those-people-the-problem
Everything Belongs by Ricard Rohr https://amzn.to/2VLIEeX
The Wisdom Jesus by Cynthia Bourgeault https://www.amazon.com/dp/1590305809/?ref=exp_fightfortogether_dp_vv_d
FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 3/2/2020

15. How our view of the Bible has changed
In Season 2 Ben and Kami share what they currently believe. This episode is about what they believe about the Bible starting with how they were raised, what started their transition and how they see this ancient that book that was so important in their lives.
LINKS Things Hidden by Richard Rohr https://www.amazon.com/dp/0867166592/?ref=exp_fightfortogether_dp_vv_d
Richard Rohr on the Bible for Normal People http://bit.ly/3ca6GWA
Peter Rollins interviews Rob Bell https://luminary.link/DupDKvN8m4
Sabbath as Resistance by Walter Brueggemann https://www.amazon.com/dp/0664263291/?ref=exp_fightfortogether_dp_vv_d
Robert Alter's Hebrew Scripture Translation http://bit.ly/3ca6GWA
FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 2/24/2020

14. Accepting our most Embarrassing Moments
Ben and Kami talk about their most embarrassing moments and beliefs from their past. They share 7 things that help them to accept past realities and how it affects our children and others who are still in that same place.
FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations
https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 1/20/2020

13. Ending Relationships with Abusers
Ben and Kami share the story of how the two-star review was deleted and what they have learned from the experience. They talk about the difficulty of sharing their story, knowing that it makes family members and old friends look bad. They also answer the questions from a listener:
- What would it take to forgive your abusers?
- How can they make it right?
- Is reconciliation an option?
FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations
https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 1/13/2020
![12. Waging War with Family [our first 2-star review]](https://d3t3ozftmdmh3i.cloudfront.net/production/podcast_uploaded_nologo400/2316605/2316605-1568747187542-c55333e7c1444.jpg)
12. Waging War with Family [our first 2-star review]
Ben and Kami share their first 2-star review that accuses them of fudging their story, waging war against family and church and all sorts of exaggeration. They share some background of the reviewer, why they think the review was written, and some behind the scenes of why we started our podcast. We also share the most valuable tool that you can use to fight oppressive systems.
@churchclarity
https://www.instagram.com/churchclarity Trauma and Recovery https://amzn.to/37N3DR0
The Drama of the Gifted Child
https://amzn.to/35AFZ8W
FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work! https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 1/6/2020

11. How our Marriage Survived the attack
Ben and Kami answer questions about how they survived when Ben was being accused of narcissism and pride. Kami talks about having a submissive personality and Ben gets accused of being the patriarchy. Both of us talk about Ben's personality and why he was a target of this spiritual community.
FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 12/30/2019
![10. Being in a CULT [our story]](https://d3t3ozftmdmh3i.cloudfront.net/production/podcast_uploaded_nologo400/2316605/2316605-1568747187542-c55333e7c1444.jpg)
10. Being in a CULT [our story]
Ben and Kami talk about being a part of a cult and 8 things you can use to determine if you are in a cult. We also talk about what kind of people are in cults. HINT: it's not what you think.
Thought Reform and the Psychology: 8 traits of a cult http://bit.ly/34QHRu0
FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 12/23/2019
![9. Biz, friends, regret, & Submission [Q&A]](https://d3t3ozftmdmh3i.cloudfront.net/production/podcast_uploaded_nologo400/2316605/2316605-1568747187542-c55333e7c1444.jpg)
9. Biz, friends, regret, & Submission [Q&A]
Ben and Kami answer more questions about their family shunning, spiritual ex-communication, and losing multiple businesses. Questions they answer:
- Were your forced out of the biz for spiritual reasons?
- Did Colin over find out about the $11,000 that Ben stole?
- How many/percentage of individuals/families who have shunned you are either employed by Epipheo, in Family Teams or members of Crossroads Church?
- Do you think you should mix money and family/friends, money and religion?
- What does a healthy community look like moving forward? - Were there early warning signs you ignored?
- Do you have regrets about your fanatical years or investing so much in the community?
- How did you get through the loneliness of losing so many people?
- Have you forgiven those that have wronged you and learned to trust again?
- Do you feel that the apology letter served its purpose?
- What’s it like hanging out with friends who give money to family that has hurt you?
- Are you concerned about backlash? - Do you think Jeremy just wanted control and power?
- How did people find you to be mentored and/or discipled?
- Why would Jeremy ask you to “submit” ?
FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/
We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work! https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 12/9/2019
![8. Spiritual Abuse, Kids, & Therapy [Q&A]](https://d3t3ozftmdmh3i.cloudfront.net/production/podcast_uploaded_nologo400/2316605/2316605-1568747187542-c55333e7c1444.jpg)
8. Spiritual Abuse, Kids, & Therapy [Q&A]
Trauma and Recovery by Dr. Judith Herman
https://www.amazon.com/dp/0465061710/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_dp_U_x_wEa8DbB2D6MBP
@adaptableme in IG
https://www.instagram.com/p/B52ue1ThPL5/ Wisdom Jesus by Cynthia Bourgeault
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1590305809/?cv_ct_id=amzn1.idea.34GPBQFBZGJKJ&cv_ct_pg=storefront&cv_ct_wn=aip-storefront&ref=exp_cov_fightfortogether_dp_vv_d
FB Discussion Group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/ We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts:
https://apple.co/2NMMq1O SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations
https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 12/9/2019

7. Being Shunned by Family
Ben and Kami tell the story of going to therapy with family members, getting contacted by lawyers to sell the Christian family biz, their plans to move to Israel, and getting bible verses about Ben deceiving gullible women so he must be shunned by the family. FB Discussion Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/969775533380492/ We're writing a book (get updates) https://goo.gl/wfaEaY YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4 FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether Product/book recommendations https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether Thank you for supporting our work! https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether paypal.me/fightfortogether Venmo - @fightfortogether CONNECT IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs RECORDED 12/2/2019

6. THE END OF COMMUNITY: ACCUSATIONS & an APOLOGY
Ben and Kami share about the 5 accusations made against them by church leaders, the impact of counseling, how they canceled every event and leadership role in their community, the apology letter they wrote, and how it was received. They finish with a cliffhanger story of Ben hearing from his friend at a coffee shop that he's being cut out permanently.
We're writing a book (get updates)
https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations
https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED

5. Spiritual Authority GONE WRONG - WHY WE STARTED THERAPY
Ben and Kami talk about submission and spiritual authority. They talk about the meeting where Ben got ambushed and started the hardest 2 years of their life, what it looks like to get accused of pride and be required to take 2 weeks off work by church leaders. We also share how ideas of spiritual submission hurt them and how Ben made the worst business decision of his life.
Part 5 of OUR STORY
We're writing a book (get updates)
https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations
https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED 11/19/19

4. OUR FAITH STORY: Rise of Christian Community, speaking in the BIG SERVICE and building a commune
Ben and Kami tell the story of a midwife miracle, they talk about how they bought three houses to start a commune, how they scheduled 20 meetings a week, practiced 90 days of abstinence, spoke at the fastest growing church in the country, went to Israel with the all-star team, and shared how starting a vlog became the beginning of the end of their Christian community.
We're writing a book (get updates)
https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://apple.co/2NMMq1O
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/32iqgK4
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations
https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://www.instagram.com/everyone.belongs/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/Everyone-Belongs
RECORDED

3. OUR FAITH STORY: Fired from church, moving for discipleship, and 12 people, one housev
Ben and Kami discuss how they got kicked out of their first Presbyterian church, how they got into 12 step groups and what they learned, why they moved across the country to go through the Story Formed Life (a 10-week discipleship program), the impact of Tim Keller, C.S. Lewis, Philip Yancey, and Richard Rohr on their life, and the biggest tragedy of our life.
We're writing a book (get updates)
https://goo.gl/wfaEaY
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/everyonebelongs
APPLE Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/everyone-belongs/id1481984327
SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/1F3YUXB23nx6Da9Zzekc9L
FFT (our family channel): https://www.youtube.com/c/FightforTogether
Product/book recommendations
https://www.amazon.com/shop/fightfortogether
Thank you for supporting our work!
https://www.patreon.com/fightfortogether
paypal.me/fightfortogether
Venmo - @fightfortogether
CONNECT
IG: https://instagram.com/fightfortogether/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/fightfortogether/
TW: https://twitter.com/fight4together
RECORDED October 4, 2019

2. OUR FAITH STORY: Professional Blackjack, Mars Hill, and the Honeymoon from Hell
Ben and Kami share about their honeymoon disaster, Kami saying she wishes she would have never got married, getting in an argument with Mark Driscoll and going to Mars Hill, Pastor Tommy getting booted from their presbyterian church, and how Ben started playing blackjack professionally. This is part 2 of their story for the faith series.
![1. OUR FAITH STORY: Virginity, the Mission Field, and Veggie Tales [PART 1]](https://d3t3ozftmdmh3i.cloudfront.net/production/podcast_uploaded_nologo400/2316605/2316605-1568747187542-c55333e7c1444.jpg)
1. OUR FAITH STORY: Virginity, the Mission Field, and Veggie Tales [PART 1]
Ben and Kami share their story of faith and religion including going to church, being raised in a pastor's family, going to Bible camp, missions trips, dedicating their life to becoming missionaries and tickling at Bible college. They share about how they got married and struggled with guilt and shame and decided to save their first kiss for marriage but nothing else. This is part 1 of a 4 part series.
Youtube Podcast: https://youtu.be/Owet9pwfSdU
