Coffeehouse Contemplative

Our minds have creative and amazing ways to help us make sense of the world, including how best to make decisions when faced with opportunities and problems. But as helpful as they can be, we may need more than our own cognitive devices to see what's truly happening.

NOTE: the podcast will be taking a break in June and will return in early July.

We may have a certain notion or preference about how life should play out, but it doesn't often match up with what actually happens. From ordering an unfamiliar dish at a restaurant to our biggest life moments, how do we reconcile the ideal vs. reality?

According to the liturgical calendar, we are still in the Easter season. Does it still feel like Easter, though? Reminders are much more difficult to come by than they were in March and early April. So what kinds of reminders do we need, and where can we find them now?

Sometimes we ask, "How did this happen?" or "How did things get to this point?" To help find the answer, we should look back on what happened the days, weeks, or months before. And what could we do today to end up with a better tomorrow?

Sometimes the images we use for God make sense, but due to life's current circumstances, there might be others that make more sense to us. This week's episode will explore the fact that we have many more such images to work with than we may think.

You may be dealing with some ailment--physical, emotional, or spiritual--that is throwing you just enough off kilter to cause you to re-arrange your approach to life. How do we live with such things, and can we learn anything from them?

Even the most constructive forms of feedback can feel awful to hear. But remembering some things about ourselves and the person sharing it with us can help us receive it better.

This episode will be released on Easter Sunday, so I'm sharing one of my own experiences that is foundational to why I consider myself an "Easter Christian."

Palm Sunday and Holy Week show us a very different use and nature of power than what we're used to and may even prefer.

My sermon at Congregational United Church of Christ in Canton, Ohio on March 26, 2023 for the Fifth Sunday in Lent.

There are certain people, places, experiences, or seasons with which we may have negative associations. And when the circumstances are right, those negative associations can revisit our bodies, minds, and spirits all over again. For some reason, I try to avoid calling this phenomenon "trauma," but that's what it is.

This week's episode is the sermon I preached at Dover Congregational UCC in Westlake, Ohio on March 12, 2023 for the Third Sunday in Lent.

Hitting our physical nerve points can hurt. Hitting our emotional and spiritual nerve points can hurt even more. This week's episode will explore how to identify what and where those nerve points are for ourselves.

All I want to do this week is tell you the story of my recent speeding ticket. 

Do we have a problem with Lent? Maybe, maybe not. But there are ways in which Lent can be problematic. This episode explores those ways, as well as offers some guidelines for choosing a Lenten practice.

After experiencing a failure or mistake, it can be very easy for us to dwell on it to the point where we expect nothing but negative things to happen going forward. That mindset can then affect future attempts for the worse.

Now that most churches are gathering for worship in person again, the old tired arguments about which form of worship is best are being trotted back out. This week's episode is basically a rant about that kind of thinking, with an encouragement to be more open to what others find meaningful.

In one's school days, our experiences of gym class and recess might have been very different, and we might have dreaded the former while eagerly anticipating the latter. What were the differences between the two, and how might we be operating with these same differences in our lives today?

I didn't have a clear single idea for this week's episode, so you get several ideas in shorter bursts instead. This week I reflect on "the grindset," rearranging my basement studio, and my current book manuscript.

We can put an incredible amount of pressure on ourselves to get everything in our lives absolutely perfect, and we may even tie this need to our own sense of self-worth. A little-known extra-Biblical document gives us some practical wisdom for how to address that.

Many still make resolutions for New Year's, with mixed results at best. But there are alternatives to this method that can be effective in helping people make desired changes to their lives. One such method is choosing a single word by which to live throughout the year. 

The Christmas season can bring a lot of positive feelings such as comfort, peace, sentimentality, and belonging. But the theological implications of this time is also meant to bring discomfort, challenge, and a call to action.

The season of Advent is the precursor to Christmas, but it serves an important purpose in its own right. This episode will explore why Advent is necessary for Christians' preparation for the new birth to come.

Around the same time that many people like to begin singing Christmas carols, Thanksgiving hymns may be chosen for worship in many churches but might not receive the same attention. This episode is my own attempt to give them the appreciation that they deserve.

Taking a view of life that is ordered and linear and has very clear steps may comfort some, but for many it doesn't make much sense. Perhaps there's another way to approach life and faith that takes better account of circumstance and context.

My new ebook, Four Weeks: Reflections for Advent, released on November 1st. This week's episode includes a celebration of that release, an overview of how it came about, and a couple readings from it.

How does one become better at something, whether art, cooking, crafting, writing, or anything else? I came up with three concepts that all start with the letter C, and then in the midst of recording I added a fourth. Whether three or four, these are what help lead greater ability in one's chosen activity.

Social media can be a wonderful place of information, connection, and affirmation. It can also be incredibly addictive, and detrimental to our minds and spirits. 

This week's episode was almost a bad idea, but then I realized that and changed it. How do we spot a bad creative idea, and what makes it bad? I explore that while sharing a few bad ideas I've had over the years.

What do you do when some part of your life just...stops? It was a part of your meaning-making and helped form part of your identity, and now it's just not there any more? What are our options when we suddenly have to start over?

Remembering and giving thanks for the life of a recently departed mentor, the Rev. Richard Plant.

When is an ending really an ending? What does it look like to measure our lives less by calendars and clocks and more by seasons? Changing our perception of the ebbs and flows of our lives may help us identify signs of change, both past and present.

Sometimes we do everything as best we can when discerning a new venture, but once we begin we may still discover that it wasn't the right fit after all. What could cause this, and how might we react after?

So many things factor into a good and faithful process of discerning what we are called to do. Here are 8 factors (among others) that are important to consider when figuring out where we may be meant to go next.

When we consider trying something new, how often might we tell ourselves that we might be too young/old/inexperienced/quiet/outgoing/etc. to actually do it? We might be depriving ourselves by squashing our ambition before we start, or soon after we try. The story of Jeremiah's call helps give insight to moving past these initial statements.

What keeps us from trying something new? It could be a variety of factors, some rational and others less so. But how do we know whether it will be good for us until we actually venture out and do it?

We take such great pains to try to tame or "seize" time, because we're often told that this is the way to measure our worth. But there's a different way to approach the limited amount of time that we have, and it's by something besides our calendars and to-do lists.

The podcast is taking July off, so this will be my last episode for a month. To that effect, I want to reflect on the concepts of rest and sabbath, and why they're so important and necessary to experience a full and joy-filled life.

Have you ever spoken to or sought guidance from a loved one or mentor who is no longer living? If you've never done so, it's not that strange of an idea. Biblical and spiritual writers offer some ideas on how to do this, but it's really as simple as imagining their presence and talking.

What truths about ourselves might we be avoiding, and why are we avoiding them? It may be because to address them is to experience discomfort and pain. But that discomfort and pain will also bring growth and greater wholeness.

We may not always realize it, but everything we go through has the potential to teach us something. It may not be the first thing on our mind when it happens, but eventually we can look back and identify what we learned from both the most joyous and tragic moments in our lives.

At the end of a hard month that has brought tragedy and uncertainty about the future, it's important to give voice to our anger, sadness, and anxiety. This week's episode explores the theology of lamentation and offers a brief guide on how to do it.

We may recognize when we're in need of healing. But there are a lot of voices within and outside us that will work against us actually taking time to do it. Where'd those voices come from, and how can we discern which are truly worth listening to?

I had a few different things on my mind this week, and rather than flesh any of them out into a full length episode, I decided to just talk about all of them. So here I talk about 1) the important messages our body sends us, 2) more thoughts on being a geek, and 3) Mother's Day.

Books, movies, TV, and music help us make meaning and find community with fellow fans. They also provide ways to talk about faith and spirituality that Bible verses and theology books might not. Having just attended Cleveland Fan Expo, this sort of thing is on my mind, and so I talk about it.

After over 20 years of journaling, I’ve learned what works best for me. You may still be trying to figure out what works best for you. Here are some basic thoughts and tips for those looking to begin or improve their own journaling practice.

Many people of faith may have a strange relationship with Easter. It may be due to the past few Easters being so different due to the pandemic, or to the strange claims we make on this day, or to our pulling away from the faith community we’ve been a part of. 

Sometimes words are just words. But when we have stories, experiences, or personal connections to them, they become so much more. This includes the words and practices of Holy Week.

We have an internal voice that constantly tells us what we should be doing to make ourselves more worthy of love or acceptance. This voice may come from our family of origin, religious upbringing, or workplace environment, but it presses down upon us and stifles our joy and sense of meaning. What if we viewed the world in another way?

Having a big dream for a new beginning or a changed lifestyle sounds great in our heads, but beginning to pursue them is something else entirely. The reality of what we need to do to make the change we seek is often jarring and discouraging. Carving out smaller steps and habits is the way to get past these times of frustration or hesitation.

We each have days that are personally meaningful to us. There are the more obvious ones like birthdays, relationship anniversaries, and holidays, but we each may also have days that we ourselves acknowledge and remember but that most others have no idea about unless we tell them. And yet marking those days is as important to us as the others, and maybe even moreso.

Pursuing your creative passion involves a certain amount of awkwardness, since you'll need time to develop yourself as a creator. But then when it comes time for the question of whether to share your creation with the world, that brings a new set of fears: of being laughed at, or rejected, or ignored. It can take a lot of courage to share your passion with others, but the possibility of finding your audience outweighs the risk of looking foolish.

On March 7th, my new book, No Perfect Time: Brief Essays on Life and Faith, officially releases. I take time this week to talk about where it came from and why I'm publishing it the way that I am, as well as read two entries. I'm excited to share this new creative work with my expanding listener base.

Ash Wednesday--and the season of Lent in general--is known to be a time of humility, repentance, and being honest with ourselves about our shortcomings, mistakes, and mortality. With all that's going on in our world every day, why would we want to pile more on? This episode will explore the lesser desirable themes of the upcoming season, while also exploring their positive qualities (no, really, there are some).

We encounter moments for which we prepare carefully and with attention to as many details as we can. But then something might happen that demands our adaptation, testing our ability to change our approach in order to respond. If we try to stick strictly to the script, we may miss out on an opportunity for growth. But if we allow for this "eruption of the real" to happen, we may experience life more fully.

We tend to associate the season of winter with scarcity, barrenness, and despair, where signs of life are more difficult to come by. It's also a season where we are left with all that we are facing, with less to shield ourselves from dealing with it. But even bare seasons can carry hope and redemption and the promise of new life, even if those things are harder to see.

Many people have a tendency to see illness in terms of failure, laziness, and weakness. This view places an extra burden on the sick and disabled, which are among the last things that they need. Rather than guilt and shame, those who suffer from illness need healing and support, as well as a re-framing of the meaning of illness in general.

What’s a moment where you long considered doing something different or letting go of something, and you finally did it because circumstances pushed you into doing it? We may dwell in hesitation and rationalization and safety for so long, but eventually reach a point where staying where we are is no longer an option. Sometimes it's less than ideal, but at other times, it's exactly what we need.

Our thoughts are often scattered by the number of different responsibilities that we have to keep track of, that any one of them is always in danger of not receiving our best effort. Before taking on any helpful tips or tricks regarding how to focus, we first need to explore the issues underlying our lack of focus, which often stem from our sense of self.

Anger is one of the most socially unacceptable emotions, in part because it makes others uncomfortable, but also in part because it is often expressed in destructive, harmful, and abusive ways. As a natural human emotion, anger is not wrong in itself, but what we do with it can be. Rather than avoid our anger, we should take time to understand it better, and to discern how best to express it.

Some practices that help reduce anxiety may involve breathing exercises or talking things out with others. But just as effective might be actions that involve taking it out - not on people, but on inanimate objects such as hitting a bag, stomping balloons, or going for a walk or run. Sometimes we need something much more active as a form of release to bring us back to ourselves.

The past few years have been marked by anxiety, for both national and personal reasons. So where do we find peace in the midst of this? How may we be able to calm and center our minds, hearts, and spirits not just to survive, but to truly live a life? What sorts of tangible actions could we take to tap into a vibe that sustains us?

We are now in the season of Advent, a time of 4 Sundays leading up to Christmas. It's a time of preparation for the celebration of birth, and to reflect on our need for God to do a new thing in the world. So in this final episode for 2021, I want to give a reflection meant to be a help you the listener in your own preparation leading up to this special time.

Most people associate coffee with the morning, but coffee can be for the late hours of the day as well. For many who drink it this time, it may be when coffee’s practical uses truly come to the forefront.  But again, there can be another dimension to enjoying coffee after hours. Its spiritual potential is just as strong as earlier in the day.

Coffee has a reputation of speeding things up, but I think it can also have an opposite effect.  It can help slow us down and take stock of our surroundings. Coffee may be able to alter and enhance our awareness at the chemical level, but it can also alter our awareness at the mental and spiritual level by helping us take stock of what’s around us and within us.

For some, coffee is essential to waking up. For others, it's a common cause and catalyst for socialization. It can aid in our ability to reflect and observe. This episode and the ones that will follow will be a series of meditations less about coffee itself and more about the larger experiences that it helps us enjoy.

“Forgive and forget” is one of those terms that people sometimes trot out in times of trauma, especially when one person has inflicted it on another. But forgiveness isn’t that simple, in part because forgetting isn’t that simple. When we experience that level of injury, it lives in our bodies, minds, and spirits. How might forgetting play a role in our healing? Or can it?

We may tend to frame our need for healing from trauma or loss in terms of "letting go" or even forgetting what happened, as if we won't truly experience wholeness again until this past event is erased from our heart and mind. But rather than erase it from our lives (which isn't really possible), we may instead acknowledge that it is part of us, and incorporate it into our new and emerging sense of self.

As we consider the habits and decisions that have brought us to where we are, that will especially include how this pandemic season has forced us to rethink and redirect parts of our lives. We’ve been presented with so many different changed circumstances that we can’t avoid taking into consideration that the question “what are you building” can’t be answered in the same way now.

The question "What are you building?" pertains to every aspect of our lives, but let's apply it to one thing: the church. Through this example, non-churchgoers may still be able to see how this may be applied in other ways.

Many events in our lives or in the world happen because they’ve been building for a while, set in motion days, weeks, years ago by a series of decisions and factors. We may or may not know it at the time, but they helped contribute to where things are today. Are we able to analyze how certain things in our lives built to where they did? Can we pause to look behind and see what we’ve been building now?

After admitting you can no longer do something and entering the bare season after, you may begin to get anxious about how long that season is taking. Maybe the answer involves a slow discovery or comes as a sudden epiphany. Either way, there are certain ways in which we may take active and intentional steps to figure it out.

Letting go of something can feel liberating. But then we may enter a new season where we wonder what's next, and it may take a while to figure that out. What can we do during this bare season that will help us discover what we may be called to produce next?

We receive so many messages around us that no matter how hard things get, we should be able to push through. We're told to never say that we can't. And yet admitting that we don't have the energy, resources, or willpower that we really need could be the first step to greater healing and wholeness.

It's been a long, low creative energy summer. But I'm ready to get this podcast back up and running with some new ideas and a slightly different approach. I hope that you didn't give up on me in the meantime, and that this episode popping up on whatever subscription feed you use is a welcome thing.

If the concept of hell in the Bible isn’t as clear cut as many Christians believe, what do we do with it? Can we, or should we, retain the idea of hell at all? Most importantly, does hell mesh logically with the idea of an all-loving God who shares God’s grace unconditionally? Given how damaging the idea of hell has been for so many Christians and non-Christians, it’s worth spending more time with to consider how worthwhile it really is.

Where did the popular concept of hell as a place of eternal torment come from, and how can we reconcile it with the idea of a God who loves humanity unconditionally? This week begins an exploration of the concept, including a brief treatment of the primary places in scripture on which the idea is based.

After publishing last week's episode on a theology of Star Wars, I started thinking that I wanted to continue focusing on the subject. There is so much possibility in just how the Jedi and Sith each approach the Force, that I wanted to explore it more. In particular, the Jedi tend to discourage focus on one's emotions, which ends up having devastating consequences. What can we learn from the mistakes of the Jedi to better incorporate emotion into our spiritual experience?

Star Wars is one of the most beloved and enduring pop culture franchises ever made. And it's worth asking what we might learn from it theologically. One podcast won't be able to do so exhaustively, but we can at least begin to explore the rich possibilities of this series.

My books on pop culture and theology:

I didn't have time to write and record a full episode this week, so instead I take a few minutes to process out loud what it was like to attend my first public social gathering in over a year, thanks in part to becoming fully vaccinated.

There are many signs and symbols that we need to watch for in order to discern our call. But after we begin pursuing it, there come times when we may need to recalibrate, and decide between recommitting ourselves or taking a different path. In that sense, calls can be cyclical, and recognizing where we are in the cycle can help us choose what to do.

What comes to mind when you think of the word "calling?" Do you believe that you have found yours, or are you still searching? What goes into seeking a call, anyway? The answers to these questions may not be straightforward, but there are certain signs and elements that we can watch for.

Have you ever walked into your workplace or some other place to which you've been dedicated, and realized you no longer have the energy to be there? Can you name something that you used to approach with energy and passion, that you now regard with cynicism, apathy, or despair? This feeling is called burnout, and we need to talk about it.

So many of us live closely by our schedules and to-do lists. But those schedules and to-do lists come with worries and an overdeveloped preoccupation on what comes next. We have both the possibilities and limitations of any given day, and both can be gifts.

Christians know Palm Sunday best as the beginning of Holy Week, during which they are invited to reflect on one of the stories from the Gospels of Jesus' ride into Jerusalem a few days before his crucifixion. It tends to be a celebratory day, as well as a lead-in for what comes later in the week. But the story's implications carry so much more than what we may tend to see.

After months of watching lockdowns begin in other countries, it was the United States' turn in March of 2020. Now here we are a year later, and we have experienced and lamented so much. Have we allowed ourselves to grieve over this past year? Will we allow ourselves to deal with lingering effects of grief even after we begin to return to a post-pandemic existence?

If you were asked, "What's one thing you wish you were better at," you may actually be able to name more than one thing. We all have activities we wish we could do better, or habits we wish we could develop or break. We may recognize that the key to all of this is more practice -- "practice makes perfect," as the saying goes. But the pursuit of perfection may sabotage us before we even begin. Fortunately, there are other ways to think about practice that are more reasonable and achievable.

It's been about a year since the pandemic lockdowns began. Events have been cancelled or postponed over and over, and life in general has been turned upside down. This entire time--and more frequently now that an end slowly appears on the horizon--many have been talking about going "back to normal." But will everything really be exactly as it was, and will we really want it to be?

All the COVID-related lockdowns and cancellations began during Lent 2020, leading someone to create a meme that read, "This is the Lentiest Lent I've ever Lented." This year, we are still faced with going without many of the same things, and questions of where hope and new life may be found are still with us.

With all that we've been through and all that we've learned, how might this Lent be a source of renewal rather than added despair?

The inaugural episode of my new podcast.

Many across the spectrum of religious experience and belief carry with them a question: “Where is God beyond what I know? Where is God beyond the walls of my place of worship? Where is God beyond the pages of my sacred texts and songs?"

There is no one answer to that.

I figured that the best way to begin would be to tell a little of my own story, and why I'm passionate about finding the spiritual in everything.

My books: