Lost Spaces: Memories from Gay Bars, Lesbian Clubs, and LGBTQ+ Parties

Sometimes I feel a bit dumb (or maybe just a bit sheepish) about some of the revelations I have through doing this show, especially since we're so close to 200 episodes (eek!) and I feel like I should know it all by now...

But, then, on the other hand, the fact that I'm still learning so much is part of the reason that I'm so excited to share these stories with you.

And this week the thing that resonated the most is the idea that when things are at their absolute worst also happens to be the time when being in a sweaty nightclub is actually the most fulfilling....

This week I was lucky enough to sit down with comedian and podcaster Sheria Mattis, and it helped me refocus on the importance of clubbing and nightlife and release. In those times of my life when things have felt so difficult and knotty and hard, being out and shocking my senses was the best way for me to recalibrate,.

Oh, and before you listen to this episode - if you don't know who she is already you should probably google Rachel Maddow, because... well, we talk about her quite a lot and it's useful if you know what she looks like!

Do you have any memories of Rock N Rollerskate, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

Find out more about Sheria by listening to her podcast, Semi-Woke - a show where Sheria brainwashes her co-host Pranav with one woke concept a week with the ultimate end goal of turning him gay. I mean, what's not to love?

You know how they say that no matter who you fall in love with during the course of your life you'll always compare everyone to your first true love?

Well, I think that's also true of nightclubs.

Which I know sounds a little wacky, but I wholeheartedly believe that there's something really magical about your first place.

This week I sat down with Digo and Caleb from the podcast Ants Humans Stars to find out about Digo's lost space, Mars Bar, which was in Richmond, Virginia.

You can quickly see why he loved this place.- it was one of those dive bars that had an especially cheesy 80s night every week.

And, it came at just the right time in his life - he'd just dropped out of college, fled to the nearest city, and was trying to fall in love (or, as he puts it, he was chasing D)...

I loved this conversation because of the reminder of the importance and pull of the dancefloor.

Do you have any memories of Mars Bar, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

You know how sometimes these conversations are only very, very, very tenuously linked to a queer space, and in the intro I try and come up with some justification for why we didn't talk that much about it to prepare you for the episode ahead?

Well, dear listener, this week I'm not even going to try to insult your intelligence by pretending that we talked about a queer space, cause we didn't.

I failed you.

BUT, that's not to say that it's not a great conversation!

I was lucky enough to sit down with Jaimie Kelton, actor, voiceover artist, author and host of the Queer Family podcast. And in our conversation we talk all about what it's like to grow up in one of the gayest cities in the world, San Francisco, but still battle with coming to terms with your own sexuality, how to shed the idea of yourself being a 'good girl', and why the stereotype of the u-haul lesbian is so damn persistent...

Do you have any memories of queer spaces that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

Out of all of the musicals you could possibly blame for making you gay, I would have guessed that Les Miserables would be somewhere near the bottom of the list.

But not, it turns out, if you are radio presenter, author, and host of the Coming Out Stories podcast Emma Goswell, who had her queer awakening with thanks to the story about a French peasant and his quest for redemption in 19th century France... Hmm...

We caught up to talk about the Manchester in the 90s, and in particular the lesbian bar Follies, which sounds like one of those delightfully bizarre places that has a little bit for everybody (including those who just want a nice cup of tea and a sit down!).

Before we get in to it, and in order to set the context for the beginning of the episode, we start off by discussing the strange rivalry in England between the North and the South of the country.

I'm pretty sure every country has their own version of this, but worth stating that the North is seen as more down to earth whilst the South is seen as snobby and hoighty.

Total oversimplification, but hopefully that's enough to get us going.

Do you have any memories of Follies, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

Ok, this might be a weird thing for me to admit... but, before this week's conversation, although I knew what polyamory was I hadn't really thought about the fact that there is a whole subculture around it, and that includes slang terms and specific inter-relational concepts...

But, of course there is! That's just what human beings do!

So, this was a useful conversation for me to help expand my vocabulary and think a bit differently..

And, who enlightened me? Well, it's Canadian stand up comedian Rush Kazi, who joined me to share stories about Zelda's, a diner that was in Toronto's gaybourhood in the 90s and 00s.

Along the way we talk about biphobia, the bestest way to prevent UTIs, and how to dump 15 people simultaneously via text message.

Do you have any memories of Zelda's, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

This week we are headed to Stonewall!

Only not THAT Stonewall (sorry if I got your hopes up)...

No, instead of the bright lights of New York city we are headed to small town Oklahoma, to visit the Stonewall Tavern in a town named Stillwater.

And whilst this bar wasn't technically a gay bar, it did create a safe environment and give people space to be themselves and figure out who they are.

And one of the people who went there is Anthony Criswell, who is one of the hosts of the Beards and Sundries podcast alongside his husband Joe and their friend Jay (who you may remember from a recent episode of the show!).

One of the things that I love most about this conversation is that Anthony is a recovering people pleaser, and he gives us some advice on how to assert yourself in your relationships (which I, of course, immediately start to overthink and over-examine, but, hey, that's what you've come to expect from this show, right?).

Do you have any memories of Stonewall Tavern, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

Before anything else I need to give a huge apology to this week's guest.

When we were originally arranging to talk I was very strict with him and firmly said that we could only talk about one lost space and not, as he wanted, talk about the entire shifting queer scene in Toronto....

But... well... you can probably guess when happened when we got together to chat. We went ALL over the place (which is a good thing! The chat is A+)!

So, although we originally got together to talk about Toronto's 'The Steady', (which you might remember as I was lucky enough to interview the venue's owner, Keaton Kash last year), the conversation takes in a number of other spaces and nights.

We talk about dates that never end, throwing the perfect bachelorette party, and being so conscientious that you take the time to come out to everyone in your life individually...

Do you have any memories of The Steady, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

So, I had a bit of an a-ha moment fairly early in to this week's conversation, and it's something that I've been wrestling with and trying to reconcile ever since.

For most of my childhood I had to just suck it up and accept that things were a bit shitty, because in the back of my mind I told myself that one day it would all be better. And, so, I ended up tolerating a lot of bad behaviour directed towards me.

And, I've started to realise recently that I've brought that mindset in to my adult life, and have continued to tolerate shitty things far beyond what is reasonable.

Anyway, that is all to say that I got a lot out of this conversation...

And who helped provide that a-ha moment?

Why, it's none other than comedian Jeena Bloom.

Now, Jeena wanted to talk about queer spaces that she'd never even been to, but which existed in her small-town Florida 90s childhood as these almost fabled places that everyone in town knew as the gay and lesbian bar.

She shares why those places were special to her even though she never set foot in them.

We also talk all about mid-life crises, sugar daddies, and being meant for the big city.

Do you have any memories of Dockside, or clubbing from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

Straight people are great.

Well, most straight people are.

Or... some straight people are?

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that despite the fact that straight people are ok (-ish) sometimes you just need a good ol' queer friend to help show you the world.

And, when most of your friends are straight people you can just end up going to where they want to go and do the things that they want to do.

And this can kind of get in the way of you developing in to the queer creature you're meant to be.

This is partly what happened to this week's guest, Brian Rowe, the host of A Piece of Pie: The Queer Film Podcast.

Brian moved to Chicago from small-town Illinois in the late 90s, and quickly found himself gingerly stepping his big toe in to Spin, a lost space that is so legendary we've already featured it twice on this podcast (once with Alexis P Bevels, and once with BB Kyle).

In this episode we talk all about our quest to find identity, the difficulty of making friends, and what kind of sex we think MAGA supporters deserve (but, you probably already know the answer to that).

Small town Illinois, moving to the big city, and

Looking for identity, trying to make friends, navigating bad dates

how straight friends are lovely but sometimes hold you back from getting down

—————-

Do you have any memories of Spin, or maybe a lost space from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

We talk a lot on this show about the very, very first time that people went to queer spaces, and all of the wonder and dread that comes with that…

But, there’s another time that we don’t celebrate enough (and which I think might actually be better), and that is going out in your late 20s…

For most people this is a time when you’re a little more settled, a bit less desperate (let's be honest), and you’ve started to ease into yourself and who you are…

Which brings us to this week’s episode…

Filip Jeremic is a Canadian Comedian and Writer who moved to New York after finishing theatre school in Toronto in 2014.

It was here that he lived that 'struggling artist' life, replete with skanky share-houses, taking any old job he could just to stay afloat, and dating older men so that they could buy him dinner ..

We caught up to talk about The Rusty Knot in NYC, which technically wasn’t a queer space, but became one on a particular day of the week (which you'll learn about when we get in to the chat).

We talk about the joys of day drinking, the thrills of NYC, and I get slightly panicky and moralistic about free alcohol for some reason...

Do you have any memories of The Rusty Knot, or maybe a bar or a club from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

What do you do when you live in a small town that has no queer presence? Well, you go right ahead and create that presence yourself!

At least that's what you'd do if you were this week's guest, the writer of the soon to be released 'Tyranny of the Fey', Terry Bartley.

Now, Terry comes from a tiny tiny tiny town called Danville in West Virginia, USA.

Just how tiny is it? Well, the population is a mere 600 people!

After coming in to a little bit of money Terry decided that he would open his own comic book shop, Spoiler Warning. And, whilst not exclusively queer, he went out of his way to make sure that the space was inclusive, which even included hosting a Pride event right there in that little town.

We talk all about falling out of love with religion, realising that not everyone feels the way you do, and being a role model in your community. Let's find out more....

Do you have any memories of Spoiler Warning, or maybe a queer utopia from your own small town that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

One of the things that I've noticed is fairly common in people who come out later in life is just how much of a hurry they are in to experience ALL of the queer shit they've missed out on...

And that is what happened to this week's guest, podcaster and voice-over artist Phil Corin, who, upon realising that they may not be heterosexual was on a mission to make their way to the New York City lesbian bar Meow Mix (1996 - 2004).

And once they got in to the bar? Well, the gloves were off, but you'll have to listen to the episode to find out the whole story...

In this episode we chat all about coming out tactics, lesbian pulp fiction, and.... our complicated feelings about single-gender spaces...

Do you have any memories of Meow Mix, or maybe a bar or a club from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

So, this might be the saddest episode we've ever had...

And, I don't say that in a sensationalist way!

I mean it legitimately. So, if you're not in the right headspace to listen to a sad chat then maybe come back to this episode another time.

But, for those of you who are in the mood for a little contemplation let me tell you all about my guest, Robert Black.

Robert is probably best known as being a porn star, and in fact is this year celebrating 25 years in the business! But he's also much more than that, obviously, and in the last few years he's launched his own podcast, Sexual Heroes, and youtube channel which gives practical tips about self-care and sex for queer men.

But today we are going back in time to when he was but a young 18 year old going out on the scene for the first time. And, the bar he went to, Casa Lido in Trenton, New Jersey, quickly became his second home. It was here that so many important life events happened for him, helping him figure out who he was and what he wanted from life...

So, I've already said it's a sad chat. But, there's always light and shade in these things - during the chat we talk all about this concept of chosen family and what that means to each of us, the joy of the dancefloor, and I get a bit of a flirting lesson from Robert...

Do you have any memories of Casa Lido, or maybe a queer coffee shop from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

I'm still thinking a lot about this week's conversation. And, in particular, it's made me think about the things I do in my life just to live up to other people's expectations of who I should be. And I'm trying to unpick that and understand it better...

But, I'm getting ahead of myself.

Let's get in to the episode.... This week I'm chatting to the burlesque artiste, the-prodigal-titty-of-the-Motor-City, Lottie Ellington. She's originally from Detroit, but found herself living in Richmond, Virginia for a while.

At this time, the queer scene was not always so welcoming - very white, cis-male heavy, and anyone who doesn't fit in the box was made to feel very unwelcome - and, so, Lottie didn't really bother to explore the scene...

But then she signed up for burlesque classes at Dogtown Dance Studios, and she found - first of all, that she loves performing burlesque, and second of all, a whole group of queer, like minded people at the studio... and that is why it's her lost space...

We talk all about Lottie's infatuation with Wonder Woman (the OG Lynda Carter version!), how some people find it difficult to separate the performer from the person, and the pressure that we feel to live up to other people's expectations...

Do you have any memories of Dogtown Dance Studio, or maybe a queer coffee shop from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

So, I'm just going to come right out and say it - school kind of sucked. 

And, it's bad enough when you have that gnawing suspicion that you don't fit in, but the real kicker is when other kids start to notice this too, and they think that the most appropriate response is... to go out of their way and make your life misery... 

I was never really popular, and so I just learnt to keep my head down and survive the experience. But, for this week's guest, Wil Fisher who is the host of the podcast Queerly Beloved, the experience was different. He went from being one of the most popular kids to being a social pariah overnight. 

How would you even begin to get your head around that?

But, in a weird way, being an outcast gave him an opportunity to evaluate things he may not have otherwise done, and that time alone let him figure some things out about himself... And, it was at the San Diego queer cafe Euphoria that he got to *ahem* practice that all a little more... 

We talk about running in to your teacher in a queer space, listening to Gregorian chants on your first date (how romantic!), and coming out to your dad all thanks to Dolly Parton....

Do you have any memories of Euphoria, or maybe a queer coffee shop from your own scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

So, I have something to admit. I have not been dancing in a really long time. And, when I say dancing I mean sweaty, throbbing, disgustingly sticky kind of dancing. And, I kind of miss it...

I got a nice reminder of how important it used to be in my life when I caught up with Alex Marcus, the Podcast Director of The Pop Break, a digital pop culture and entertainment online magazine, for this week's show.

Alex is from New Jersey, but made the move to New York City when he went to college in the mid-naughties, and this gave him an opportunity to spread his wings and explore his queerness a little more...

And what better place to do that than on the sweaty dancefloor of Splash nightclub, a sprawling two-floor gay bar in Manhattan that closed in 2013?

We talk all about the weird hobbies we adopt to 'pass' as straight, being the token gay, and what it's like to lose yourself in a crowd.

Do you have any memories of Splash, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

So, you've probably picked up from listening to this show that I have mixed feelings when it comes to the concept of 'representation'.

I still can't quite articulate why I'm a bit iffy about it, but I think it's something about the commodification of the term. Like, yes, I agree that it's important, but it seems to have been hijacked and monetised by people, which I think is a bit icky...

But, you're not here for my half-baked ponderings.. you're here to listen to a chat about a lost space. So, why am I going on and on about it?

Well, it's because, within this episode, I think there's a really good example of why representation is hugely important. It was through seeing other drag kings that this episode's guest, German drag king Maria Moschus, was born.

And it was a trip to Buenos Aires, where Maria's alter-ego Taiina went for an internship in 2019, where the character got to grow and develop at Carrera de Reyes, a drag king night that ran from 2019-2022.

We talk all about that night, the magic and the chaos of being in a new city, and how not to feel stifled by drag stereotypes...

Do you have any memories of Carrera de Reyes, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

Ok, be totally honest with me - have you ever hooked up with a work colleague?

Or, actually, the question I'm more interested in is - have you ever known about a work-place hook up that hasn't ended catastrophically?

Well, if you haven't guessed already by the way I framed those questions - this week we are finding out all about a doomed hook up that our guest, Twitch streamer extraordinare, BBKyle had when he was working at Spin, a bar in Chicago's queer neighbourhood Boystown.

But, that's definitely not all that we talk about... Though he is now based in Tennessee, BBKyle says that he loved his time at Spin so much that he would still be working there today if it hadn't closed... now, that's some bar!

We talk about how he ended up in Chicago, what queer spaces offer that other spaces don't, and how being forced to wear a uniform of nothing but booty shorts helped Kyle learn how to love himself...

Do you have any memories of Spin, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

This podcast started at the end of 2019, and had been running for a few months when... well, you remember what happened in 2020, right?

And, for the longest time... I kind of wanted this show to make no mention of the pandemic or Covid-19 or any of the shit going on in the world. I wanted it to be an escape, and an opportunity to think about something else for the people that were listening.

But, maybe (and just maybe) I'm finally ready to talk about the pandemic....

One of the wonderful things that happened in that time was this explosion of online drag shows, where performers found new ways to continue entertaining people when they weren't able to do so in bars and clubs.

And, it's one of these ongoing drag shows, Dragoslavia, that we are going to learn all about on today's show.

Dragoslavia is the brainchild of Slovenia-based drag queen Mentalika, who set it up as a way of bringing together queens from Balkan countries. We met to talk about her reasons for setting up the show, logistical nightmares, and what it's like to set up a drag house before you've decided who your drag character is.

Do you have any memories of Dragoslavia, or any other online drag shows or parties that happened during the pandemic? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

So, if you've ever listened to this show and thought to yourself 'queer clubbing is not as good as all these people seem to be remembering' then: 

• Firstly, maybe this show isn't for you.... 
• Secondly, you'll be glad you stuck it out because this week we're doing something different!

Yup, we're complaining about how rubbish queer clubbing is!

And, who is joining me to be a big ol' grump? Well, it's the singer/actor and writer of the book 'Cancer, Musical Theatre, & Other Chronic Illnesses' Edward Miskie!

Edward first moved to New York City in the mid-00s, and tried to embrace queer nightlife, including lost spaces like Splash and Vlada, but ultimately decided.... well, he'd really rather not. Along the way he became a sole survivor of a rare Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma, which, as you can imagine, went right ahead and turned his life upside down.

We talked all about the terrible life lessons we learnt from Sex and the City, how a cancer diagnosis changes your perception, and all the many, many things that are wrong with the queer scene...

Do you have any memories of terrible, terrible queer clubbing that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

So, one of the things about drag that i'm really fascinated by is the decision-making process behind crafting a drag character... 

Because, to me, deciding on who your drag character is - what they like, how they talk, how they present to the world - is a big commitment... almost like a marriage maybe? 

And, by that I mean you are committing to another person (or, ok, character) that will forever be associated with you. Because of this you've kind of got to make sure you think it through.... But, then, I guess, you run the risk of OVERTHINKING it (my signature move!)....

To find out a little more about this I sat down to pick the brains of Ty Jeffries, the man behind the drag character Miss Hope Springs (an old-school, glamourous chanteuse)....

We got together to talk about Madame JoJos, a legendary nightclub in London's Soho that closed in 2014 after being open continuously since the 60s...

So, of course we talk all about the gentrification of Soho, the evolution of drag, and... what it's like to be a horny teenager on the train...

Oh, and I should also say that there is a mention of Polari in this conversation, which is a slang language used by predominately gay men in the UK up until about the 60s when it started to fall out of favour...

Do you have any memories of Madame JoJo's, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

When you’ve never been to a leather bar it’s easy to view them as seedy and debaucherous and a little scary... and, yeah, ok, they are all of those things - but they’re also surprisingly quite wholesome! 

Well, maybe not wholesome, but they definitely offer a more down-to-earth and judgement-free alternative to the more mainstream queer spaces that you often find in big cities…

And one of the lost leather bars with the absolute best name ever? Why, it's Chicago's Manhole!

This week I am joined by singer/songwriter Homer Marrs, who first moved to Chicago at the turn of the century to study improv comedy, and slowly but surely spread his wings in the city's queer scene. With one or two 'hard lessons' along the way...

Do you have any memories of ManHole, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

This week I learnt a new word, and that word is.... thelephobia... which, if you didn't know already, is the fear of nipples...

And why is that important?

Well, it just so happens that this week's guest, Dr Joshua Lobb - who is a Senior Lecturer in Creative Writing at the University of Wollongong (and our first ever doctor on this show!) - happens to have a fear of nipples.

But, not just any nipples. REALLY big nipples... The kind you would find on the bartenders who worked at Sydney's The Albury Hotel (which is, coincidentally, the lost space we talked about on this week's show!).

We talk all about gay fashions, being intimidated by a certain type of coolness, and.... friendly groping?

If you love a good ol' fashioned leaving-my-hometown-to-find-myself story, then this week we've got a doozy.

You know how sometimes you go in to a space, and you instantly feel at home? Like, none of that awkwardness whilst you get your bearings - everyone is friendly and open and you feel totally comfortable.

And, when you find those places you want to make sure that you go back time and again and soak up those good vibes. Right? RIGHT?

Well, not so much for this week's guest, the award winning writer Marlee Jane Ward, who went to Sydney's Club Kooky only the once after being taken there when she first moved to the city way back in 2001. 

Why did she not go back? Well, you'll have to listen to the episode to find out!

We talk all about how to be unapologetically yourself, running away from home without a plan, and Y2K fashions...

Do you have any memories of Club Kooky, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

We've talked on this show before about the pressure (whether real or imagined) that you can feel when your sibling or someone else in your family comes out before you. In past examples on this show we've only ever been talking about one person in the family... but, on today's episode we're finding out from children's author Will Kostakis what it's like being one of three gay brothers... and, by the sounds of it, they all had different journeys (i hate myself for using that word. sorry).

Snd, that's not all we talk about. we have a really interesting conversation about using writing to process and understand your world, getting comfortable in your own skin, and standing in the shadows of the corner of the queer bar hoping beyond hope that no one notices you... .

Do you have any memories of The Midnight Shift, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

Do you like to go out and get properly, properly messy? Do you have a go-to place where you can just let loose and have a rollicking good time without fear of judgement or reprimand?

If you answered yes then I think you might enjoy hearing about this week's bar, Badlands, which was in the heart of San Francisco's Castro district. Although our guest, Neil Higgins (from FMKLit Podcast) only went to the bar once he certainly knows a thing or two about getting messy. 

We talk about finding where it is that you fit in, how to respond to handsome men crying on the footpath, and crappy cartoons from the 80s!

Do you have any memories of Badlands, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

This week's guest, comedian Arielle Isaac Norman, may have only gone to her lost space 'Bout Time II', a handful of times in her life, but that doesn't mean she wasn't impacted when she discovered that the bar closed at the start of the pandemic in 2020 of all that she had lost.

We start off talking about when Arielle moved to Austin (which is where the bar was), in 2015, and then go in to brainstorming drag king names, being a serial relationship hopper, and I get some tips on how to initiate a threesome on the dancefloor...

Do you have any memories of Bout Time II, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

As much as this show celebrates queer spaces and ‘the scene’, i think there’s also always been a bit of a recognition that it's not perfect — it can be exhausting trying to fit in, trying to find people that you like, and trying to just be. 

But, sometimes... just sometimes... you find the space where you feel that you're meant to be and it can feel like coming home. 

This week we are joined by Scott Flashheart, from the Probably True podcast, who long-time listeners will remember has been on the show before! This time we're talking about the George and Dragon, a bar in London that closed in 2015. But, long before it closed, Scott says that the place helped them to feel like he had found his people. 

We talk about the elements of the 'right kind of gay', looking for your tribe, and knowing when it's time to leave the party.

Do you have any memories of the George and Dragon, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)

Most of the spaces that we talk about on this show closed because they were no longer making a profit or the owner just decided that they wanted a change...

But, we've never talked about a space that stopped existing because it was knocked down by a TORNADO! 

Until now, that is...

This week's guest is singer-songwriter Dylan Rice, who grew up in Salt Lake City, and used to go to The Sun Tavern, a space that first opened in the 70s and was one of the only safe spaces for queer people in the conservative US state of Utah.

We talked about mormons (cause, of course we're going to talk about mormons - he's from Salt Lake City!), developing crushes on teachers, and leaning in to the ridiculousness of flirting... 

Do you have any memories of The Sun Tavern, or clubbing from your own queer scene that you want to share? Well, if you have please get in touch - I want to create the biggest online record of people's memories and stories - go to www.lostspacespodcast.com and find the section 'Share a Lost Space' and tell me what you got up to! Bonus points for embarrassing photos!

You can also find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/lostspacespod), Instagram (www.instagram.com/lostspacespod) and Twitter (www.twitter.com/lostspacespod)