Kiss Your Franchise GoodbyeApr 13, 2020
It's Scream 2 and Andy, Brooke and Melissa are... talking baseball? Also sequels. And how this is the most stacked supporting cast in the history of sequels... except maybe Sharknado 2. Treatment of Black characters in this movie and franchise. Are there any sequels better than the original?
Next week Scream 3-- go Rangers!
New series! Why this is the most Xennial movie ever. Intergenerational trauma and absent parents, absent adults. Kevin Williamson, Wes Craven, and more horrible tales of how awful the Weinstiens were. Drew Barrymore and that opening scene. The first "meta" film. Queer coding. Goddamn patriarchy. Rated NC-17 for "viscera." Box office and an insane slate of movies playing in its opening weekend.
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny
We say goodbye to Indy with a few tears but lots of analysis, and tangents about dating and patriarchy and legacy like you wouldn't believe! We also rank the Indy films and you won't believe how much we agree and disagree!
Next up we're doing Scream! So pop your popcorn and let's talk about our favorite scary movies!
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
It's the Indy movie we've been putting off and here we are finally. The film's treatment of its Indigenous people. Indy getting older. What are the elements of an Indiana Jones movie? Shia LeBeouf! Andy's studio notes and Malinche.
Next week is the Dial of Destiny which is the most Mark de Leon movie ever.
Stay to the end for a "bonus scene."
Hi Barbie! An all-Barbie episode featuring Brooke, Melissa, Kitt, returning from her previous guest spots Kelly, and Brooke's Skipper-- Pru! Welcome Barbies! Barbie and the Rockers Ken!
Opening and closing music from the 1997 Lillith Fair featuring Indigo Girls, Sarah Mclachlan, Jewel, and Meredith Brooks.
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
It's Kitt's birthday movie pick-- the 2013 Ben Stiller film The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. Why Brooke hates Ben Stiller (but not in this movie). How we Mitty'd out of this movie several times. Major Tom/David Bowie. Danny Kaye and James Thurber. AMAZING stacked supporting cast.
Hope you enjoyed! Next episode is our Barbie episode!
Indiana Jones and the Daddy Issues, er, Last Crusade
Special guest Christi joins us! How "Isolation Playhouse" script readings kept us sane during the pandemic. Everyone saw this in theaters! Some of us... in MALLS! We loved this movie! Because it's inoffensive? How this movie is about Spielberg's daddy issues. Upside/downside? Great movie about fathers and sons... and no female characters needed. A 20 minute debate about whether Elsa was a Nazi or not, and how complicit she was with acting with the Nazis. But those action sequences! Hat on a hat Russian nesting dolls of action. And those deaths! We want more women in the movie, but can we also get more Sallah and Marcus being bros? If you've got a date in Alexandretta she'll be waiting in Iskenderun. John Williams and why San Antonio doesn't have a symphony any more.
The Diet Coke commercial- "You have chosen wisely!"
Next week is... The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (Ben Stiller version) which you can watch on Paramount Plus and also a 5 minute tangent about the Strange New Worlds/Lower Decks crossover. After that is BARBIE and per Andy's birthday wish a very special format. Listen and find out!
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
Indy's back (and so are we!) and most of the crew is back together fresh off our Barbenheimer viewings. History with this movie. PG-13. The sexism and Willie. The racism. But also? This movie has some great stuff-- the mine cart, Short Round, and more. A tangent about Sound of Freedom and Operation Underground Railroad.
Next time back with Last Crusade!
Raiders of the Lost Ark
Don't look Marion! It's Raiders of the Lost Ark, and we have Joe from Tales from the Comic Shop with us. Indy/Star Wars merch nostalgia minute. Melissa is extra salty this week-- we talk briefly about the Texas Rangers. Is this a James Bond movie? Andy breaks out his weirdo George Lucas impression. The elephant in the room re Indy and Marion. George Lucas wanted her to be 11? Great, so he's a sexual predator tomb raider. But also this movie rules. Maybe artifacts like these should remain buried. NAZIS. John Williams score. Studio notes. A side conversation about film, practical effects vs cgi, Alien, and why movies from this era are so special.
Next week we get even more problematic with Temple of Doom!
Saturday's Warrior Watch-Along Commentary
And we're sorry.
We also take a tiny break right before the "Line Upon Line" song and hit pause for a few minutes. But we tell you when we restart.
Again, we're really really sorry.
It's Brooke's birthday so... we watched Saturday's Warrior? We're sorry. You can hear our entire commentary track, too. But here's the short of it. This is terrible. Pam is all the tropes. The Population Bomb, eco-fascism, and white nationalism. The goddamn patriarchy and its part in this.
But join us next time for a movie with slightly fewer Nazis-- Raiders of the Lost Ark!
Evil Dead Rise
It's Evil Dead Rise, which was just in theaters! Weirdly, we end up not talking about it that much, but instead go offf on long tangents about Scream, woodchippers, and then Brooke reveals her special birthday movie choice at the end.
It's a doozy, and Andy would like to announce his retirement from the podcast as he has now gone to live in the woodchipper after this episode's studio note.
Evil Dead (2013)
Andy, Melissa and Brooke are OVER this one. How did they make the tree rape WORSE? Diablo Cody? The Final Girl trope. No clever sign off because we're just so done.
Next time it's Evil Dead Rise, which is now available on VOD!
The Cabin the the Woods
A quick Evil Dead Rise review! All about Joss Whedon (and Drew Goddard!) Separating art from artist, but... hoo boy. Fran Kranz as Whedon self-insert. MGM's financial troubles and the delays of the movie. Bad test screenings. Harry Knowles, Butt-Numb-a-Thon, and sex pests helping sex pests. Supermarket Sweep. Everything on the whiteboard. Archetypes. Sigourney Weaver is the GOAT. Not a troll-- Dante's Peak. Alt universe versions of this movie made by other directors.
Back next time with 2013's Evil Dead reboot by Fede Alvarez.
Tucker and Dale vs Evil
It's an Evil Dead-adjacent movie, Tucker and Dale vs Evil. The cabin looks like the cabin from Evil Dead! And the inside is like every other horror movie! And coupons for 2 for $3 chili dogs-- no limit! And all the teenagers are dying!
Check out this handy list of all the deaths here!
This movie is glorious and how did it not make more money?
Next week, a continuation of the "cabin in the woods" trope with The Cabin in the Woods! Then back to Evil Dead after that.
Army of Darkness
All right you primitive screwheads, listen up! It's time for Army of Darkness and boy are people mad!
Army of Darkness: "You once found me funny."
Andy and JB: "Honey, you got real misogynistic."
What does hold up? Practical effects. Zany bits. Skeleton army. Rooting for the skeleton army!
Through the power of time travel, Brooke appears!
Budget troubles? Box office. Studio notes.
Next week, a tangent! Tucker and Dale vs. Evil! The ultimte story of teens going to a cabin in the woods.
Also, make sure you check out the Patreon- for only $1, hear all sorts of crazy stories and our continuing takes on Hitchcock movies.
Evil Dead II
What... what IS this movie? Confusing beginning. Horror vs Horror Comedy. Which do we like better? Sam Raimi's use of women characters.
Next week it's Army of Darkness! Groovy!
The Evil Dead (1983)
New season, new franchise! It's The Evil Dead, Sam Raimi's splatterfest cabin in the woods original! Why did Melissa want to do this franchise? What is everyone's experience with these movies? Content and Trigger warning: discussion of sexual assault and rape. The violence towards women in this movie. The production history of this movie. Raimi family connections! Xena! SeaQuest! Introducing our new award: Best kill/death!
Next week, the remake/sequel: Evil Dead 2 - Dead by Dawn.
69th Episode Nice Princess Season Wrapup Awards and Oscars Presented by Jeffrey Katzenberg, Co-Founder of Quibi
It's our 69th (nice) and final episode of Season 2!
Oscar predictions and thoughts. Why Brooke didn't and JB did like Top Gun: Maverick.
JB's Top "a-Ha!" moments!
JB's best and worst movies -- one of which makes Andy's head explode
Andy's Best Dogs
JB's Best Sports Moment
Brooke ranks the franchises
Brooke's bests and worsts, including ranking all the birthday/special movies
Andy ranked ALL of the movies on Letterboxd:
Melissa's worst and best
Melissa's special awards:
- Changed view
- Best crotch
- Best buttplug
- Misuse of a great actor
- Best Burt Reynolds near-redemption
- Movies that made me feel like I'm on drugs
- Should've been bad, but was good
- Unpopular opinion award
- The FAILING UP AWARD
- Best/Worst songs
Preview of Season 3... get ready for Evil Dead!
And just when you thought we were done... a special post-Oscars reaction. Listen to Andy cry! Women Talking! Melissa still won't be watching RRR.
It's Creed 3 baby! It's NOT spoiler-free! Please don't listen unless you've seen the movie. How we watched this movie: Cinemark vs. Regal vs. Alamo Drafthouse. Mr T's Treat Your Mother Right
Brooke's take via the power of editing! Again, not spoiler free. This doesn't feel like a "Rocky" movie because it isn't and feels weirdly disconnected. Can non-fans understand this movie out of context of the franchise? Why do we have to fridge another female character to motivate a main character? Amara, tho. EVERYBODY GO TO THERAPY, but especially men.
We rank the best fights, the best montages, the best movies. The Cocaine Bear Cinematic Universe.
Check out Yours, Mine and Theirs who are watching Robin Hood movies! A word about ferrets.
Then Brooke is back to offer her studio notes and rankings, and she gets the last word on THE definitive ranking of the franchise.
Next week our 69th (nice) and final episode of the 2nd season, a retrospective back on all the franchises and movies we've watched.
Creed vs Drago, and the winner is all of us! Again, we all love this movie. Dinner scenes. Phylicia Rashad, Tessa Thompson, and BRIGITTE!! Dads and babies. Embarrassing Russian lessons with Andy. Weird tangents at the end about running/kinesiology/mental toughness, Nile Rogers, watching movies with Andy and Kitt's parents (these are all separate tangents).
Next week Creed III comes out! We'll have a new episode early the next week after it comes out with no spoilers to give everyone a chance to see it. But we'll also rank our favorite fights, montages, and movies across the series.
It's Creed! Is the best Rocky movie actually Creed? Ryan Coogler. Check out the Patreon for our discussion on Fruitvale Station. Check out Roy on Yours, Mine, and Theirs.
Creed II is next!
Grave of the Fireflies
One of the saddest movies we've ever covered- perfect for JB's birthday! In the waning days of World War II, two siblings, Seita and Setsuko, are orphaned and struggle to survive. Melissa offers a specifically spicy take on the film, and it devolves into a discussion about creeping fascism globally and in the United States. This is all about humanity and how we treat each other, which is generally badly.
Next week we're back with Creed, which is far more fun!
Check out The Patreon where we just covered the Hitchcock boxing movie The Ring and next up Fruitvale Station.
It's the sixth and final Rocky film, and we have another fight on our hands! Is it just boring, or is it artsy? Is it just trying too hard to be artsy? (Don't worry, kids. We all still love each other very much, even when we fight like this.) "Little Marie."
Next week we're taking a break before the Creed movies and watching a JB birthday pick, "Grave of the Fireflies." Get ready to cry!
Also, check out our Patreon where we talked about The Lodger! You can "buy that for a dollar!" and have access to all our Patreon shows! https://www.patreon.com/kissyourfranchisegoodbye
Also make sure you check out Roy on Yours, Mine, and Theirs. They're watching wrestling movies next!
We've got a fight on our hands as Brooke kind of loves this movie and Roy, Andy and Melissa do NOT. By the end we're comparing it to other famous turkeys we've covered like Demolition Man, The Power of One, and Moonraker and whether we liked Rocky V better or worse than those movies.
Go vote in the Yours, Mine and Theirs poll about which wrestling movie they should watch (unless it's Foxcatcher)
Next week we catch up with what Marie has been doing all these years in Rocky Balboa.
It's Rocky IV and Andy doesn't understand Roman numerals. The whole gang is back including Roy Fillmore and he and Andy promise not to talk about the Director's Cut too much. We break that promise over and over. But seriously, watch the theatrical cut. Roy's sexual awakening. Paulie. The sex robot. Drago isn't Soviet enough. "Oh no, it's Brigitte!" We re-enact a 1990 SNL sketch of Sly Stallone and other Hollywood stars giving hockey ideas to Wayne Gretzky. It's propaganda. Disagreement over whether this is a good movie or not.
At about the 2 hour mark, Andy sits down with his former LDS mission companion Jared to talk about searching for Russian copies of Rocky IV in Volgograd in the late 90's.
Next week: a movie that doesn't exist! Don't watch Rocky V. We'll watch so you don't have to.
Our prediction? PAIN as Roy Fillmore from Yours, Mine and Theirs joins us again. This is the template movie for everything else. Adrian is the best. Carl Weathers' shoulders. Andy's rant about why 1982 was the best summer of movies ever.
Watch Rocky IV for next week-- probably the theatrical cut but if you want to watch the new Director's Cut you can do that too.
Roy is back for a rematch talking Rocky II! The nueroscience of changing from southpaw to righty. Stallone's injury. "You're great!" subtitle. Twitter mail to Creed! Socioeconomics and gender norms of "the man provides." A birdwalk about Mormonism, women having careers, LGBTQ acceptance, etc. Roy is The Best Mormon. The Catholic Church robbed Melissa of her ambidexterity. International Rocky II posters ("Revanche!") and merch. NIGHTHAWKS! Watch Sylvester Stallone on The Muppet Show.
Pity the Fool with Clubber Lang in Rocky III next week.
Check out the Patreon for too-spicy-for-main chat at: https://www.patreon.com/kissyourfranchisegoodbye
Lords of Flatbush Trailer - Listen on Patreon!
We're launching our Patreon with movies too spicy for the main feed. Hear this two minute preview as Andy and Brooke talk the Rocky-adjacent film The Lords of Flatbush, but we also talk about the history of condoms, the Gilmore Girls, crying fetishes, and Andy's dalliance with screenwriting during the LDS cinema boomlet in the early 2000's.
We're joined by Roy from Yours, Mine and Theirs, where he and Andy also talked about Rocky two years ago! Roy, Brooke and Andy think this is probably the best live action franchise ever. JB disagrees, as there's a lot of clunky character stuff at the beginning: you want to just put on Rocky 3 or 4. It's hard to separate this movie from the later films. It's even harder to separate it from the filming process itself and what it meant culturally. Apollo Creed RULES. The politics of this thing are all over the place. The date scene is super rapey.
More next week with Rocky II!
And please subscribe to the Patreon to hear Brooke and Andy talk dirty about Lords of Flatbush. https://www.patreon.com/kissyourfranchisegoodbye
The two old boys are back to talk about Lady Vengeance? (Everyone is back next time for Rocky-- we promise!) It's a Christmas movie? Decision to Leave and Hitchcock. The visuals of this film and use of color.
A long weird side conversation about the filmography of David Koepp.
Back next time with Rocky!
Dirty Rotten Franchise
It's a Melissa birthday pick with the Michael Caine/Steve Martin two-hander Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. We just need some happiness and joy. Steve Martin's kinesthetic acting. Michael Caine's oily hair... or is it crusty? First impressions from first time watches. This is a remake? And there's been another remake? This could have been a Mick Jagger/David Bowie movie. Don't watch Bedtime Story or The Hustle. The problematic stuff. But overall this movie really holds up!
One of us was naked this whole time.
Next week we start The Vengeance Trilogy, and contrary to what we say on the show, do not watch Oldboy first, watch Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance, and DEFINITELY don't watch the Oldboy remake.
State of the Franchise 2022 - Our 100th Episode!
Hear ye, hear ye, hear ye! Andy is here to lay down the Robert's Rules of Order and lay this episode on the table.
The state of the franchise is amazingly strong, with theaters open and basically every major movie coming out in 2023 some sort of sequel, reboot, or adaptation of an existing property. Some of them sound great, some of them sound terrible.
Also, it's finally happening: we're doing a patreon and starting a multi-year project where we're going to watch every single Hitchcock movie. Yikes. Find us on https://www.patreon.com/kissyourfranchisegoodbye as we promise all sorts of exclusive embarrassing content.
Our adventuring party rolls for initiative, D&D style, and Melissa, JB, Kitt, Brooke, and Andy nominate our franchises for season 3. We're also adding one fan-chosen franchise next year! Listen to what we chose and enjoy the strange concoction of artsy, musical, and popcorn we have planned.
Next week we're watching DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS to celebrate Melissa's birthday, and then we're heading into Vengeance Trilogy territory! Get ready!
Toy Story 4
It's the final Toy Story film! Should we start a Patreon/OnlyFans? Brooke's wine pairing and horoscope reading. Is this the best one somehow? We all feel Forky wanting to throw himself away. Trauma in 3 vs lighter tone in 4. Codependency in the toys. Unpacking Woody being the odd one out and that times have changed.
Melissa had a hard time deciding between Dirty Rotten Scoundrels and Tucker and Dale vs. Evil for her birthday movie, but we're going with the 80's comedy classic. But first, we have our 100th episode and 2nd (annual?) State of the Franchise to pick out our Season 3 movies. Indy 5 is the audience vote winner, and there is a tie between Lord of the Rings and Star Wars for 2nd. John Wick is only 1 vote behind. If you want to sway the vote, get in the comments and decide! And maybe we'll do it?
Also don't forget to vote for realsies! (it may be the last election we ever have, so. . .)
Toy Story 3
The toys are back in town. Not since... has there been such a trilogy! We love this movie, but we spend an hour absolutely savaging it. Spanish Mode Buzz can f*** off, but not if it's exclusively making fun of Spaniards because those colonizers can f*** off even more! Lack of women in the movie is Pixar telling on itself. Gay jokes about Ken are Pixar telling on itself. LOTSA HUGGING BEAR is specifically telling on John Lasseter and the work culture at Pixar/Disney under him. But we really do love this movie! So much trauma.
Next week it's the return of Bo Peep in Toy Story 4!! Last chance to weigh in on the Facebook poll for our Season 3 franchises!
Toy Story 2
The Godfather II of animated movies? We’re all just toys in Andy’s toybox. This was Brooke’s first time watching this. Our histories with the movie. The most Andy has ever cried at a movie. The intense pressure and timeline of making this movie. The time it got deleted off Pixar’s servers. Star Wars references! The first 5 minutes vs. Lightyear. Cursed premise. Could use more music. Gender imbalance. Are Bo Peep and Woody involved because she’s the only girl toy or because there’s actually something there? Sideshow Bob. Sadness for Stinky Pete. Should we take our Funko Pops out of the box? Tune in next week for Melissa’s take on Spanish Buzz. An amazing rant about the Great British Bake Off Mexican Week. Box office. Rex as representation of mental illness. Preparing for Pixar tears. Kitt the toy surgeon. Twiggy and Fatso the penguins. Best lines are also the best visual gags. The outtakes! Geri’s Game! Do we or do we not mess with the Fey? Sarah Mclachlan and the peak of sadness, “I Will Remember You”, what if Buble/Goulet sang Sarah Mclachlan songs?
ANDY'S COMING! EVERYONE HIDE! We talk about the first Toy Story movie and why we love this franchise. The long history of Pixar and John Lasseter- watch The Pixar Story on Disney+. Only men made this movie? SHOCKING. The return of Quibi-co-founder Jeffrey Katzenberg. Joss Whedon and a pause for reactions. Fan theories about Andy's mom and family situation.
Next week it's time to cry with Jessie's cowgirl song. Watch Toy Story 2!
It's our longest episode ever! as we discuss Turning Red, boy bands, parenting, and generational trauma. Then we then go through our wrap up of Disney Princesses and rankings. Post credits interview with Aaron "Bear the Greeter!" (starts at approximately 3 hr mark)
Next week Toy Story, and don't forget to vote in our Facebook poll about the franchises you'd like to see covered on the show!
We're going to talk about Bruno. Melissa is joining us from a submarine? (Stay to the end for the bloopers where you can hear the submarine dive). Which family member are we and why is it Luisa? Lots of talk about mental health and family trauma. WE FUCKING HATE THE ALAMO, OK? US foreign policy towards Latin America. Andy's gift is segues back from tangents.
Next week we're finishing Disney Princesses (for now) with Turning Red! Bring your favorites ranked and also your favorite boy band songs!
Raya and the Last Dragon
It's a princess movie about. . . COVID? The world is broken but we're here to talk about all the ways Disney tried to do something new and different and groundbreaking here, but also a discussion about how it's a step backwards when we use a fake place like Kumandra instead of real places like Coco and Encanto do. We still really love this movie though.
Content/trigger-warnings: we discuss COVID, death, family problems and injuries, and sexual assault and rape in this episode.
And stop pitting women against each other!
We also include some bloopers/outtakes at the end of the episode including a side discussion about RRR and why Kitt isn't here this week.
Next week we talk about Bruno! We're watching Encanto!
If you want more ASMR seduction from Andy, please message the podcast but we really don't think any of you are looking for this.
It's Disney's first theatrical animated sequel, and what a doozy! The billion and a half dollar behemoth with an anti-colonialist subtext? We have guesr Richard Templeman joining us who had never seen Frozen 2 before! Check out his podcasts:
Read more about the Sami people.
Listen to Melissa on Yours, Mine and Theirs! She's going back for the next episode, and next month Brooke is on there too! We're taking over!
Next week we're talking about Raya and the Last Dragon!
Okay, so this our longest episode ever at over 3 hours, and EVERYBODY CRIES. Sorry, not sorry. Special bonus appearance by James Estrada at about the 1:30 mark. Special bonus Mexican box office discussion around 2:15.
THIS EPISODE FEATURES A LOT OF CRYING. Andy doesn’t remember to introduce the podcast. Trawling for sponsors: Magic Spoon, Mucinex, Tacos, or sex toys.
CRYING PART 1: Brooke’s niece Coco who passed away, her family history and her grandmother from Spain. Grief.
The importance of when this movie came out—right in the middle of Trump and terrible things he was saying. The invisibility of Mexican representation in media. This gives us hope. “We Should All Be Feminists”by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. A clip from “The Danger of a Single Story” about her “single story” experience of Mexicans (clip begins at 8:25). This is like a giant hug specifically for Mexicans.
Nailed a bunch of specific things like the humor and even the family interactions. The genesis of “so specific it’s universal.” THE CHANCLA. All the characters are well-rounded, everyone gets to be right, everyone gets to be wrong. Grandma Imelda is amazing. Check out Chavela Vargas singing La Llorona and Paloma Negra. Andy is scared by La Llorona. Is “de la Cruz” as a name indicative of classism/ colonialism?
Hummingbirds – fuck around and find out! Oaxacan spirit guardians and their depiction—GORGEOUS animation. Frida! Generational trauma. Can we NOT do the militarized border in our fantasy land? Disneyland is the same.
A WILD JAMES ESTRADA APPEARS!!! We have a 1:1 conversation about Coco. We do more crying talking about James’s grandparents. You can find James on Facebook at Nerdy at Home Dad or semaj_adartse on TikTok and Instagram.
BOX OFFICE! MEXICAN BOX OFFICE and Mexican box office records! Studio notes. MORE HUMMINGBIRD TALK. Read: The Most Powerful Aztec God had the Hummingbird as his Spirit Animal. Mexico Lore: Hummingbirds. More about hummingbirds in culture.
Kitt and Andy almost cry talking about their grandfather.
Next week we're back with Frozen II and we're talking about Elsa and her horse (not whores, Brooke). INTO THE UNKNOWN!
Everything Everywhere All At Once
It's Andy's birthday so we're watching his favorite movie of 2022. Special guest James Estrada from Geek Parenting Podcast joins us, and you can check out his Twitch streams here. Why this movie works. Nietzsche. Buddhism. Let's go to the rock universe. Generational trauma. Absurdism. Butt plugs. Hot dog fingers. Randy Neuman as Racacoonie.
Next week we're back at Disney with Coco!
It's Moana! and we have lots of opinions. First time watcher for Melissa. Memories of seeing this in the theaters. Stupid coconuts. Stop sending people on these 2 week vacations to places! How does one get on a Disney cultural advisory panel? Tamatoa, Maui, and big dick energy. Lin Manuel wrote a Bowie song for Jermaine!
Ok, fine, Coco is now a princess movie too.
Next week, we do a birthday movie for Andy- listen to see what it is! And will Melissa hate it? And then stripper movies for the holidays maybe? "What a gift!" -- Brooke.
Disney goes "woke" with the whitest people you know? Or just a story about sisters. The long history of Frozen starting in the 1940s, and including what happens when you put different people in charge of writing and directing, in this case writer/co-director Jennifer Lee. The sister summit. Adele Dazeem. Is Elsa gay? We're 100% on board with killing the parents. Do reindeer antlers female?
Go vote in the Facebook poll-- Andy eliminated 5 movies from his birthday movie runoff, so go vote harder if you have strong preferences.
We're all still sick with COVID (get back to us on that sponsorship, Mucinex) but let's talk about Jim Henson's/David Bowie's Labyrinth! Why Kitt bought this on VHS with their own money. Gaslighting: the movie and the Elaine May connection. What if Michael Jackson had been in this? GIVE US ADAM DRIVER MUPPET PRIDE AND PREJUDICE YOU COWARDS. Patriarchy is everywhere. from gas stations in Oregon to the Supreme Court.
Next week, back to Princesses! It's Frozen time!
Go vote in the Facebook poll to help pick Andy's birthday movie... unless you like Channing Tatum musicals or movies about time travel and multiverses, in which case just let it ride.
Aka the episode where everyone is sick. Somehow JB spread COVID via the podcast and we're all recovering. But let's talk about Brave! And Brenda Chapman. And John Lasseter. And Haggis. And rules for dealing with the Fey! And bear puns!
Next week we have a special birthday treat -- Kitt has chosen Labyrinth, which will be lots of fun!
It's the story of... Flynn Rider? How is this not Rapunzel's story!?!? We break down why Brooke hates this so much, along with long discussions about emotional abuse and gaslighting. The Philadelphia Story! JB shows up at the end and we go on a tangent about Duets, the Huey Lewis/Gwyneth Paltrow movie. Also crazy merch from this movie, like a trading card game?
Please note that this episode was recorded prior to the Supreme Court decision coming down in Dobbs v Jackson Womens Health Care and so while a lot of this episode does call out patriarchy, we don't address any of that. Abortion is health care, and if you can, please support organizations giving to women of color who will need direct aid getting access to proper treatment.
We've been dreaming of a true love's kiss and this movie that tries to have it both ways with princess tropes. It is, however, enchanting, as is Adele Dazeem, who inexplicably doesn't sing in this movie at all (Kitt has some studio notes about that). The movie is still incredibly white and straight, even for 2007. Nominations for Patrick Dempsey's nickname: McBoring? McDiva?
Next week we cross into 3D cgi animation for the first time with Tangled! Get your frying pan ready for Brooke's hot takes on why she hates it!
The Princess and the Frog
It's The Princess and the Frog and we welcome Sandee Moore back from her previous appearance and Kitt is now back as a regular princess contributor.
Musker and Clements are at it again, and Lotsa Huggin Bear Jon Lasseter is making it even worse. The cult of Oprah? Depictions of vodou in mainstream media. Neil Gaiman. RANDY NEWMAN. Zydeco.
Andy does the LONGEST studio note ever with a complete rewrite. We're very sorry.
Go to Sandee's Instagram, follow her, like her posts, and send her money to buy one of these Tiana dresses!