By Nick Shibanov
Joyfulness BroadcastApr 21, 2020
Unravelling Fear and Doubt with Jeff
In this live recording of a one-on-one session, you'll be able to join Jeff in looking deeper into the source of fear and unravelling it. Jeff has 2 months left until his life coaching and energy healing course is finished and was experiencing some fear about what will happen after this. It brought up the deeper fear of "Am I good enough?" and "How will I make this work?" In this episode, we come to see that life is so much lighter and simpler when we see that it's not about "me". The less we think about "me" and the more we consider the "we" of life, the more joyful and harmonious life feels. But how can we do this? Let's explore it together in this episode! If you'd like to try out a session for yourself and/or record an episode like this one together - check out nickshibanov.com for more details.
It's already OK with Chandler
In this episode, we are trying something new! Chandler was willing to have our session together recorded and shared here with everyone. What you are listening to is a live session where we unpack the internal challenges that Chandler has been experiencing. As you listen, you may find that we are not so different after all. Those inner conflicts that we experience are actually shared! It can be tough going through life with the array of confusion, doubt, and fear that can make life feel quite difficult. So let's take some time to look deeper into it and see if we can support ourselves in feeling a little lighter, freer, and happier. If you'd like to have a session and share it with the world in this way, you are welcome to do so at nickshibanov.com
Ep 94 - Is Effortless Living Possible?
Can life feel effortless and easy? Explore that in today's episode. As we discover all the expectations and resistance we carry within ourselves, we can start to recognise that effort doesn't exist "out there". Instead, when things feel hard and difficult - at least on an emotional level - we can trace the root within our own minds. It is the resistance that makes things feel hard. As this is gently released, life becomes easier and far more enjoyable. In fact, we discover that our inner most nature is effortless and peaceful.
Ep 93: From Should to Could
How often do you feel that you "should" do something? Or on the other end, that you "shouldn't" do something? These feelings and beliefs contain us and do not help us in any way. Who needs the constriction? Why not simply choose from a place of freedom? In this episode, recognise that you could. Feel into that sense that it's possible and that you are free. Let that motivate your choices and interactions in life and see what happens.
Ep 92: Peace is here now
The mind - thought processes, logic, and ideation - is entirely based on what was or what might be. It cannot comprehend or recognise what is. In its preoccupation with what was and what might be, that which is now is missed. Yet that which is now is peace and calm itself. It is you. With the recognition that you are not what was or what might, but rather that which is, comes a deeply relaxing peaceful serenity. To subscribe for two extra weekly episodes you can click here.
Ep 91: Recognising Awareness
Beyond ideas, concepts, memories, and imagination, there is just this pure presence of awareness. Thoughtless. Desireless. Free and Formless. This is what you already are - your pure essence. It sounds foreign to the degree we have come to believe that we are a limited individuals with thoughts, viewpoints, and opinions. But is that what you are? Let's explore this together.
Ep 90: Everyday Surrender
Each moment we drop trying to push life to happen for us, we re-discover that life is here with us and for us. That what we are is inseparable from life. We can build up our surrender muscle with just small things every day. Missed the bus - could I allow that and let go into life as it is now? Dropped a coffee mug. Lost a shoe. How much could we surrender? The more we do, the more at peace we are. Peace and surrender are one and the same thing.
Ep 89: Dropping Defensiveness
Carrying around defensiveness is a result of identifying with a perspective, belief, or feeling. When there is identification with something, it feels like it is what we are. So when that thing is challenged, it feels like a personal attack. When it feels that way, defensiveness arises. For example, we may identify strongly with a particular role - i.e a wonderful parent or a great student or a hard worker. When that role is challenged, then some defensiveness may arise - "How dare you?!" is what is felt inside. When defensiveness arises, this is not "bad". It is simply an invitation to discover what you are beyond all those beliefs and ideas. What are you beyond all memory and imagination? Let's explore this together.
Ep 88: Releasing Pressure
In life, we carry around a lot of inner pressure unnecessarily. Thoughts tell us that we need it and it helps us to feel pressure. But in actuality, it simply weighs us down and makes it harder to take clear effective action. It becomes more difficult to enjoy life when we carry around all that pressure. So in this episode, let's release some of that pressure. To work together, visit nickshibanov.com
Ep 87: Beyond Memory
Can there be problems without memory? We spend so much time bouncing around between what was and what might be. In this episode, allow yourself to drop into what is right here and now. The presence beyond memory. To explore this together visit https://nickshibanov.com/
Ep 86 - Freedom is what you are
Freedom is already what you are. It is not something that you have to get or earn or become. When awareness is noticed, then it is noticed that awareness is free. That freedom is awareness and that awareness is freedom itself. The word "freedom" and the word "awareness" appear different but beyond the appearance, there is just one presence. That one presence is what you are right now. It is beyond thought or images or memory. It is here in plain sight. It is now. Experience it with this guided release. To learn more about the Fear to Freedom Live 6 Day program click here.
Ep 85 - Be what you are
Just in being what you are, noticing that you even are, cuts right through any sense of problems or worries. Right now, notice that there is a presence here that allows for reading to happen. This presence is witnessing reading happening but is itself undisturbed and uninfluenced by the reading. This presence is what you are. Let's have some fun with this. To explore this deeper, visit nickshibanov.com
Ep 84: Serenity
There is a calm presence behind the mental construct of memory and imagination. It is present now. The more it is noticed, the more obvious it becomes and the less can interfere with the inner sense of calm. This episode is here as a guided way to notice calm and deepen in presence. Like a warm hot chocolate for the soul. For a deeper exploration of this visit nickshibanov.com
Ep 83: Inner Freedom Now
The mind tends to look to the future for freedom. It ties freedom to conditions, achievements, things. But right now in this exact moment, beyond the appearances of perception, the stories of conditioning, and the imagination of the mind, there is the calm and peaceful presence of freedom. In this episode, we will notice it together. Join the Inner Freedom Now Fb group to continue the exploration.
Ep 82: The Embrace
When we embrace what is arising, then it is allowed to pass. When we resist or push back in any way, then we are holding it in place. This applies to feelings, thoughts, and life situations. Anytime we want to change something, we are resisting it. We are coming from a place of lack because we only ever want to change something if we feel a lack of something inside. As we embrace, we start to feel more and more full inside - like we don't need anything. When we feel that way inside, then our actions are far more powerful and we find that we don't have to change anything. In fact, we can just hold something in mind from an inner place of power and it will start to potentiate and manifest in our lives. In terms of feelings we want to change, we will find that wanting a feeling to change is what holds it in place. The embrace is what allows the feeling to change. For support with this visit nickshibanov.com
Ep 81: Kindness Now
Start experiencing kindness now. Sit back, relax, and enjoy these 30 minutes together as we delve deeper and dissolve criticalness and harshness in the warm embrace of kindness. This episode is designed to be easy and relaxing to listen to. You don't have to do anything. The more you relax into it, the greater ease you will experience. To receive support in dissolving the obstacles to happiness, peace, and a life of ease and grace, book a session on my website - nickshibanov.com
Ep 80: Being Whole and Complete now
We tend to spend so much time and energy on wanting without realising that it's possible to have without wanting. Here's what I mean by that - wanting implies lack of. As an energy, wanting is a sense of lack. Whilst having is a sense of being whole and having it all. So, counter-intuitively, we can actually let go of the feeling of wanting something and instead welcome the sense that we are already complete and whole now. How do we do this? One way, is to simply notice that the presence of awareness is already total and complete. It goes no-where. Does nothing. Is always present. It is always whole. Living more from this place, life becomes far more fulfilling and easy-going.
Ep 79: Love them for it
"Could I love them for it?" is a powerful question I originally heard in the Sedona Method Living Love course. It really helped re-contextualise my options and help me see that it's always available to just love someone for being the way they are - regardless of what that is. Undoubtedly, this brings up many defences in the mind and it can sound rather foreign and strange to love someone for something that isn't liked at first. But the power of this approach is incredible. In this guided podcast episode, we will walk through it together and you can see for yourself how powerful this simple question can be. To receive personal support for whatever you'd like support with, learn more at nickshibanov.com
Ep 78: Truly Free Relationships
What does it mean to experience truly free relationships? What does that look like? In this episode, we will be exploring that question and unravelling what I have found to be some of the key obstacles to experiencing enjoyable and free relationships. One such obstacle being when we want to get security from outside of our own consciousness. In this episode, we will be recognising the security that is ever-present right now. As we recognise it, something magical happens to our relationships. Enjoy the show! Get the Free book here.
Ep 77: Discomfort into Comfort
Let's transform discomfort into comfort. Just as we choose to let something bother us, we can also let go of being bothered by something and let it be ok. Normally though, what we do is try to push down the discomfort. Try to make it go away. Fight it. This just inflates it further and feeds its power over behaviour and our state of mind. When we simply let go, the discomfort fades as it does. To explore this further together, feel free to visit nickshibanov.com
Ep 76: Awakening with Fiona
What am I? So much of our lives are lived on the surface. We focus on the specifics of the seeming problems. We focus on the stories that the mind generates. We focus on the drama. We focus on the upsets. We focus on what we want to change. Rarely do we stop and look deeper than appearances. Seldom do we delve to the core and truly investigate the most fundamental question: "What am I?" In this episode, let's pause together and take time to reflect on this most fundamental question. Let's take some time to explore this conscious presence. That which is present to these words. That which is prior to any opinions or judgements about anything. Before memory and distortion of perception. Fiona Moore works with people to explore such matters. She has really helped me! Learn more at fionamoore.com
Ep 75: Self-loathing to Trust with Anne
In this episode, we've got an awesome conversation with Anne Murphy. Anne is one of those high-achieving folks very passionate about what she does however, that came at a price for most of her life. The high expectations also came with self-loathing until a turning point whilst back-country solo hiking. Anne shared how there simply was not time for self-loathing and how there was a requirement to focus on just completing the next task as it needed to be done. I can see how there is a simple peace to that - just doing the next thing as it needs to be done and letting the stones fall where they may. I hope you enjoy this conversation.
Ep 74: Exploring Awareness as Awareness
At the heart of every problem we have is "me". What tends to happen is a thought arises such as "I'm angry at Bob" and is believed in or bought into. It's sort of like believing a movie or show we are watching to be real and forgetting that it's just a show. Well, what we tend to do is forget that thoughts are just thoughts and feelings are just feelings. Instead, we habitually treat them as having real substance to them and believe that they are referring to a real character called "me". So, in this episode, we will play around a little with this so-called "me" and see if we can come to discover some helpful things about this character. Like perhaps, the possibility that this "me" is entirely made-up...
Ep 73: Dissolving Problems
If problems were forgotten, would they persist? A curious discovery is that problems exist only as memories of the past. At this exact moment, there is nothing to say or comment about. There is nothing to think about. Don't think about this statement too much, just pause deeply right now and notice without commenting. This episode is an experimental guided problem dissolution thingy. I hope you enjoy it and I would love to hear your feedback - how did it go for you? You can email email@example.com to share feedback - it is very helpful and much appreciated.
Ep 72: What do they mean?
What do people really mean by what they say to us? Is it really about us? Can it ever really be about "me"? To understand what someone means, we must contextualise what they are saying from their perception. We must see things from their state of mind. We must take into complete consideration, how they feel and what their motivations are. Then we can truly see what they really mean by what they say. Join the "Explorers of the inner galaxies" FB group and share your reflections with other awesome people. Keen to meet you!
Ep 71: What's it like to be you with Eric
We are back with Eric for the fourth time. Each time it's magical and some beautiful threads to pull on are revealed. Strap in for a fun playful convo and see what comes of it. Here is what I invite you to try: Let go of expecting anything from the episode, open yourself to deeply seeing the hidden meaning behind the words spoken, enjoy the process of discovery itself with no worries about what comes of it - let life do its thing, and laugh along with us! Check out essays by Eric at https://www.edgeofbeing.org/
Ep 70: Joyfulness and playful workplaces with Johan
I met Johan in a funny way. I actually accidentally breached copyright laws, using the name "Joyfulness" for my business after forgetting to check international trademarks. Instead of telling me off, Johan found my website one day and suggested we work together. He didn't even mention that I was breaching their trademark! I found out later and promptly changed my business name ahaha! That sums up Johans bubbly and cooperative nature perfectly in my eyes. Johan wrote a book called "Joyfulness" and is the founder of Joyfulness Co-operative, offering personal coaching and workplace wellbeing programs through joy and play. To find out more you can visit https://joyfulness.company/... Currently looking for potential partners to bring Joyfulness to Australia! Can reach out to chat if interested via firstname.lastname@example.org :)
Ep 69: Why not be kind to you and let go?
I was watching about to watch Netflix when I noticed a feeling of pressure and discomfort. It had to do with thinking I should be doing something else. I also noticed a judgement about feeling pressured and not feeling free... I realised this was not very kind and followed the process highlighted here to release much of this emotional weight so that I could just enjoy myself with less guilt, shame, and pressure... For support in letting go visit: https://nickshibanov.com/
Ep 68: Human Resilience with Andrea Stephenson
To me, Andrea embodies the resilience of the human spirit. Imagine being raised in a cult that was preparing you to be a human sacrifice. How does one recover from that? Yet for Andrea, none of her life challenges has stopped her or been seen as excuses to complain. What amazes me most about Andrea is that I got the sense she would be the last one to complain about life. She is an incredible human being and I'd really love for you to hear her story. As you listen, look for the deeper meaning that the appearance. See if you can see her incredible nature and recognise your own inner resilience in the process. For what we see in people is ourselves. To learn more about Andrea you can visit her website here.
Ep 67: Sacred Nature
A topic close to my heart. If we, collectively speaking, want to change the way we treat the earth, we must change the way we see it. Right now, it is very rare to see the earth as sacred. Few truly recognise the divinity of nature. When we are blind to the sacredness of nature and of life, we treat it accordingly. For me, the most important part of having healthy forests, clean streets with lots of trees, flowers, birds and insects, and helping mitigate the extremes of weather, is to return to our hearts and recognise our own divinity. When we see our own divinity, we see the divinity of nature. We then treat it as such. Please share this episode with those who may be receptive and open to listening. With love... Nick
Ep 66: Life is a gift
Life is a gift. Where did it come from? Was it our own effort? Was it our achievement? Did we earn it? Or is it just a freely given gift? It's funny how surprised people are to receive a gift. We feel unworthy. We feel like we have to earn it. But if something is given to us, then it is done so out of love. Love knows only how to give freely. It doesn't ask for anything in return. This can be shocking in a culture where most things are a bargain or have a price. To discover that life is a gift, we need only surrender everything until there is nothing to surrender. Join the surrender challenge community here.
Ep 65: Discontentment into Growth with Joseph
Let this episode speak to the truth that we don't have to settle for any excuses in our life... We can turn anything into a golden opportunity for growth if we are willing and ready...sometimes we aren't but let that not veil the truth that we always CAN. Joey is a life coach and from what I gathered, basically helps people step into the life of their dreams - whatever that may be. This is a great episode for the dreamers who want to live their life as a masterpiece. To check out Joey you can visit his website here.
Ep 64: To Love is to Listen with Daniel Bruce Levin
Daniel lived as a monk for 10 years... He was the Director of Business Development at Hay House and played a big part in helping it grow from 3 million a year to 100 million a year... Daniel is also an author, recently publishing his book The Mosaic which looks to give the voiceless a voice and help us make sense of life with compassion and care... But most of all Daniel, to me, is like compassion walking around with limbs. Sitting with him I could feel how much he cared and that we could just relax, have fun, and learn about life together... His presence reminds me of a recent Dr Seuss quote I heard from the Lorax movie on Netflix (which you should totally watch if you haven't already): “Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, Nothing is going to get better. It's not.” That's what I felt by the end of our conversation... So I invite you to sit back, relax, and enjoy this beautiful episode... For more on Daniel, you can visit The Mosaic Website here or his personal website here.
Ep 63: I exist
At this moment, what is blocking the overwhelming gratitude of realising "I am"? For most of us, our attention is restless and always fluctuating between thoughts of the past of future. Our attention rarely settles and notices that which is obvious... such as the fact that "I exist". In this episode let's see if we can unravel the obstacles to that gratitude so that you can experience it for yourself!
Ep 62: Life re-orienting experiences with Jeff Peroutka
In this episode, we got Jeff Peroutka with us for a fun conversation about life. Jeff is 23 and runs two successful businesses, an impressive dude! But he is also a human just like all of us and that's what I really like about chatting with these awesome people. It shows us that they are just like us and that we can do what they do if we want to! Then it becomes a matter of discovering what we really want and what we thought we wanted but didn't actually. Jeff shares some recent experiences he had where there was quite clearly a miraculous intervention. As you listen, pay attention to the meaning behind the words. Notice how an increased intensity and sincerity of prayer resulted in a rather miraculous event. See what you can learn from this conversation and enjoy!
Ep 61: How to negate limiting beliefs
Negation has to do with an understanding that truth is independent of beliefs and that no beliefs are at all required to live in the light of truth. So then, negation says "I am satisfied only with the total and complete truth, nothing else is valuable". When only truth is valued, negation automatically occurs. If you would like support in the negation of beliefs, you can book a call together on my website: https://nickshibanov.com/1
Ep 60: Anger
There is probably a lot more anger within us than we realise. If we take this to be true and it turns out to not be, then we don't really lose anything. If it turns out to be true, we are able to deal with it more gracefully and consciously. The way I deal with anger is the way I deal with anything, primarily through prayer and openness - I always try to be as open and willing as I can be to becoming aware of that which I am not yet aware of. This helps me a lot. When intense anger arose just recently, this approach allowed me to watch it come and go without acting from it. As an experiment, however, I opened myself to playing out this anger vocally. I felt the viciousness of the anger intensify and then just dissipate. I did not express it to anyone. This is an important point to make. Expressing anger is not something that I find helpful. I find it much more helpful to just witness and allow the coming and going of the anger energy. I thought I'd share some things I've learnt about anger in this episode.
Ep 59: Past Life Research
Past life research can be very helpful in re-framing feelings in the light of a deeper understanding. One can see how having this aha moment tends to be very releasing and automatically results in acceptance of a feeling as it becomes perfectly clear where it came from. In this episode, I'll just share the ways I'm familiar with researching our past lives. This is still an ongoing area of exploration for me but I thought I'd share this information so you may know this is an option and explore it further if you so choose.
Ep 58: How I use dreams
Dreams. Memes. And time machines! What do they have in common? I don't know! But I do know that we spend a lot of time asleep in dreamland. Wouldn't it be cool if we could use that time to learn about ourselves and deepen in understanding of the human condition. Well, that's what I love to do anyway! In this episode, I'll share the key insights to understand that will allow you to understand that approach I take which helps me tremendously! Tune in to learn and grow together! I'm just making this all up as I go and would love for you to join me in this adventure!
Ep 57: Listening to Life
Listening has been something that I have had to re-learn and continue to deepen in. I've had to nurture it within myself. It's not something I was taught growing up. For me, it really took feeling like someone cared for me - that pure love of just listening with no agenda - to start caring about myself and others in a deeper way. So, when someone recently came across as rather self-focused and not interested in others, I was able to empathise on an experiential level and happily provided a listening ear out of care and compassion.
Ep 56: Nothing to fix
A popular perception is to view ourselves as incomplete, broken, faulty, and in need of fixing. I know this view well for that's how I saw the world for a while. It wasn't until I came across someone who loved and cared for me as I was that I saw a different way to see everything. Not as a problem to fix but as something to understand and love. When we see ourselves with caring eyes that seek only to understand and love, problems melt and life blooms. For the accompanying newsletter click here. To email me whether you'd be interested in the book email email@example.com
Ep 55: Mistakes and innocence
How many times have we chosen something that really seemed like a good idea at the time but later, turned out not to go the way we expected? We are limited to seeing things the way we see them. We choose what makes sense to us at the time and then punish ourselves for not seeing things differently. But if we could see things differently and if another better option was apparent to us, we would choose it. Yet the fact that a mistake was made implies that we didn't know any better, or else we wouldn't have chosen it. We choose what we think is best. We often get it wrong. Often extremely wrong.
Ep 54: Chained by our own constructs
What blocks us from being in complete peace and happiness right now? If investigated, it is soon revealed that the only obstacle we have to deal with is our own mind; specifically all the conditioned beliefs and the associated heavy feelings that come with heavy conditioned beliefs. For example, there are many learnt constructs we have about love. It's like there are locks on when we can be loving and when we shouldn't. You might even experience resistance to expressing love - I know I have. So strange when you consider how open and loving most children are. They have no problem hugging a stranger - which can be taken advantage of by malicious intent. So we can see then how constructs were created to try and protect us and help us. But they served their purpose and now they are our main obstacle to understand and transcend for those interested in mastering love and maxing out their enjoyment of life. More in the episode. Book a session here.
Ep 53: What do feelings mean?
A feeling is a composition of sensations. The mind then comes in and attempts to label the experience. Stories are generated to rationalise or explain away the feeling. It's like the intellect will only allow it if it fits into the story it has about everything... So what does a feeling mean? Is that the right question? Perhaps a better question is where is that question coming from? Could we just accept feelings without having to attach a story to what is being experienced?
Ep 52: Is it worth it?
Something happens. A feeling arises. A life situation occurs. Then the mind says "this should be different". It might say it directly. It might indirectly imply it by trying to move away from what is arising or by attempting to manipulate the feeling/situation. We tend to not question this tendency of the mind. We tend to tolerate it. We rarely inquire deeper into it. If we did, we would start to learn about all the constructs which the mind has. When these constructs are threatened, it goes on the defensive. Yet each construct is just an idea. It's just an opinion trying to define the indefinable. In this episode, why don't we start to question these constructs? Let's give it a shot. Watch the youtube episode referred to here.
Ep 51: Bearing the Weight of our Choices
Every choice we make is something we have to bear the weight of. Every choice has a consequence. Some choices lead to a lot of heaviness. Other choices uplift and support us and those around us. The more inclusive the upliftment of the choices we make are, the more uplifted we all feel and the less suffering is possible. There's a lot we can talk about with this topic but before we do - in future episodes - it's good to first cover the feelings that can come when we realise that we are both accountable for every choice and simultaneously rather limited in what we can see; often something that seems like a good idea turns out not to be. In this episode, we will cover an effective approach to dealing with any anxiety and fear which that may bring up within us.
Ep 50: Reliance on Holy Spirit
The Holy Spirit uplifts me on the wings of grace. I float through life with increasing reliance on Divinity. The more I depend upon Divinity, the more ease and grace enters my life. This is an option for you as well. In this episode, I share a story that to me articulates key principles by which one can live a graceful and joyous life.
Ep 49: What am I getting out of it?
It's a powerful question to ask. We tend to hold onto and cling to things that we get something out of. By asking this question and being open and receptive to whatever might come-up, we empower ourselves to become aware of what it is we get, for example, out of our relationships. Often we seek the feeling of being wanted, of being loved, of being understood. When this is in awareness, we can then further inquire and ask ourselves why we want this. Often it comes from a feeling of lack within which, if not recognised, will degrade the quality of all our relationships through hidden agendas and attachments. As this "getting-ness" surfaces in awareness, it becomes possible to let go and own the source of all that we previously taught to get from outside ourselves, from within ourselves. With a greater sense of inner completion comes greater inner freedom and a newfound capacity to enjoy our relationships for what they are without any anxiety or stress involved.
Ep 48: The Power of Re-framing with Eric
Eric is back! This episode is golden with lots of snippets of wisdom to digest, take-in, and be with. One of the most powerful topics that interweaved the whole chat was that of re-framing. This is when we re-contextualise and re-perceive something so that we see it differently. What is interesting is that all problems can be dissolved via reframing. Why is there a problem? Re-framing dissolves the foundation of the problem and reveals that there was never a problem. It can reveal the hidden-gifts of even the most challenging situations and in doing so, uplift us with the realisation that we can choose how we see any given situation. We can choose whether we make the most of it or whether we see it as a curse.