Unrelenting Pursuit

Sometimes we think that letting someone experience the consequences of their actions is not demonstrating love. In reality, this is often the most loving thing we can do.

Boundaries are healthy and necessary to operate within God's design. When one operates outside of this reality we see so many people not stand for truth, settle for half way healing, and not experience genuine repentance. In doing that, so many people delay what God is doing in their life or their loved one.

The reality is that we cannot change someone, but we can let go of them to allow God to use the circumstances

Capacity Definition - "The maximum amount that something can contain."

Capacity has a great level of influence over every area, and it's important to recognize what depletes capacity in us individually, and also how we can increase capacity in our lives.

The reality is that there may be seasons where you need to learn to say no to friendships, extended family, time commitments, and even "good things" in order to protect your God thing. Every person needs to evaluate for themselves what this looks like, and be ruthless in protecting what matters. Don't allow crisis to necessitate what you could navigate today.

We often get questions about this season of life. This is a time when you are having to wait for something or someone, when things aren't going right, or you are just waiting for the fruition of something God has promised you. You may wonder how long you should wait, when you should stop waiting, and what is required of you while you are in this season. We go in depth on this episode and address what this looks like, and challenge you that waiting doesn't have to be passive, but should be active.

Please read Hebrews 11 and learn from those who have walked faith before you. You have an opportunity in the waiting places to show Jesus to others in a way that many can't or won't. Don't waste it.

Often we hear the questions of "why" and "why wasn't I enough, or "why didn't you choose me," when someone is walking through reconciliation. The answers to these questions can leave a couple in a circular phase of healing where neither one feels like they can win or move forward. We walk through some of the common setbacks and give some actionable steps to move you towards where you both want to be.

Is your marriage dangerous? The truth is, loving someone always involves an element of risk because your spouse has the ability to hurt you more than anyone else, and when you allow yourself to be vulnerable, and have true intimacy, it involves danger. But that danger is worth it!

And we want to challenge you to start thinking of a dangerous marriage in a new way. We want you to start recognizing the power and purpose you have together as a couple, and what God has for each one of you. So start training and utilize the armor that God has given you!

And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12

If you want to stay relevant in your life, you need to constantly seek knowledge. Are you being a willing student in your life? Do you seek to know more about your spouse, your kids, and most of all...in your faith?

Staying relevant doesn't mean shifting your foundation, but WHEN YOU STAY RELEVANT YOU STAY RELATABLE. You allow God to reveal what needs to be revealed and you allow Him to use you in every area possible! We challenge you to seek Christ as to what area He is asking you to be relevant in, and to keep learning your spouse. That is a beautiful gift!

On today's episode we give some practical advice on what maintenance in your marriage looks like, not to be confused with maintain! Often we don't recognize that the daily intentional acts we do, or don't do, in marriage leads us somewhere. We challenge each person to ask themselves, "What is one thing I can do love my spouse better today?"

We also want you to encourage you to establish:

We love sharing resources that will help your marriage and your healing! 

On this episode we have Travis & Adelle, who are YouTubers, speakers, authors, content creators, and coaches, share their story. They are inspiring marriages globally who are walking through infidelity & betrayal, to learn a healthy way of healing, through foundational truths that help couples discover true love & intimacy, as God intended.  They long to see marriages experience lasting healing & growth, and each individual becoming whole & complete, so that they can have a meaningful, thriving marriage. 

Don’t miss this one as they share from the heart and offer valuable advice and resources that will impact your relationship. 

We try and share as openly on possible with every topic, and today's episode is no different. Join us as we discuss disciplines we have developed to help us handle triggers, our thought life, and we even discuss some current struggles we are navigating through. 

We challenge you to memorize 2nd Corinthians 10:3-5 and learn to fight temptation as Jesus did. Follow His example and utilize the tools He has given you.

Does being caught in sin vs confessing have an impact on whether there is genuine repentance?

How do you truly know if someone is repentant? What does that look like? We talk about these topics and much more on this episode, and we encourage you to evaluate where your trust lies, and to listen to God’s voice over any and all others. Don’t move until He tells you to move, and if He tells you to move, be radically obedient!

In addition, we challenge you to confess to a trusted source whatever God lays on your heart while listening to this episode. And DON’T GIVE UP! There are so many resources available.

We often hear from those who has been betrayed about the struggle between where their life started being a lie, and the reality that so many of their beautiful memories have been tainted through the lens of their pain. 

On today's episode, we share unique personal insights into how this came to pass in our own marriage, and both the dangers and the necessity of compartmentalization. 

We also want to encourage you in your healing. Jesus sees you! He does not want you to be stuck in pain or shame. He wants to redeem every aspect of your life. Go to Him for it all!

Sources used: 

We are beyond honored to have Married for a Purpose Founders Greg and Julie Gorman with us for this episode. They firmly believe God holds a purpose for every married couple! They enjoy teaching and inspiring couples all over the world on how to live Purpose-Focused, Not Problem-Focused. Greg and Julie present a unique message, helping thousands of couples move forward, and we love coaching on their team and seeing this in action. On today's episode, we dive deep into what this systematic and proven process is, and how it can help lead you and your spouse towards greater unity and a shared desired outcome.

Find out more about their resources here!

We were so thrilled to have guests, Shawn and Helena Bonneteau, with us for this episode. They started Secret Habit Life Coaching in 2017 as a way to help couples overcome the harms of p*rn addiction and betrayal trauma. Since then, they have played a helping hand in transforming over 2000 relationships through their coaching services and podcast.

Both Shawn and Helena struggled with an addiction to p*rn and by the grace of God are now celebrating over 5 years of freedom individually and as a couple. Shawn is a certified Inner Child Recovery Specialist and together, they are certified sexual addiction mentors and certified Husband Material coaches. They are parents to their daughter Violet and currently reside in Canada's Ocean Playground, Nova Scotia.

You can find all their resources here!

Few people who follow Christ deny the power of prayer, but often we choose not to access it. Instead, prayer is often treated as a last resort, instead of a first step. We want you to evaluate what it looks like to go to God in prayer for everything. What would your life look like to go to Him FIRST?

The reality is that prayer may not change your circumstances the way you like, but IT WILL CHANGE YOU! Dive into an intentional and intimate relationship with your Heavenly Father and go to war for your family and your marriage! 

Remember to pray those bold prayers and then surrender to God's will,  just like Jesus did. Luke 22:42, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine be done.

Surrender is not an easy process because the reality is that we all crave control, and we like to think we can somehow dictate outcomes. However, that is not the reality, and we all need to learn to surrender every area of our life. 

We often don't consider this, but in reality we are all surrendered to something, and we need to choose what that is. You can choose to give it to God or you can choose to be surrendered to your fear, your pain, your shame, your addiction, or your past.

On this episode, we talk about what surrender looked like for each of us, and the day to day questions we have to ask God to help us in this pursuit. We also emphasize our desire that each of you recognize your need for this in your own life and marriage. Ultimately, we hope this brings you hope no matter what you might be facing and remind you who is truly in control. Exodus 14:14

WELCOME BACK TO OUR NEW SEASON!

We get very personal on this episode and invite you into the details of our renewal ceremony at 15 years, and even read our vows that we spoke to each other. Find out why we believe legacy matters so much, and how we have seen how God has moved immeasurably more than we could ask or imagine in the past 11 years. 

We also challenge each of you to look closely at what you are planting now and what that will produce in the future. 

In culture today, there is a mind-set of self-love, vs. what Christ calls us to, which is to be selfLESS. 

We were shocked by several articles that stated the reason they chose to get a divorce is because of self-love. We see the continued trend of how culture is demeaning marriage, the value of it, and also giving it the appearance of it being simple to walk away from.  In fact, the lie is that it will actually benefit your family to see you pursue happiness vs. staying in your marriage. 

Learning your spouse is an honor, a privilege you have for the rest of your life. You have the opportunity to grow individually, as a couple, and ultimately, in your walk with Christ. Don't take this privilege for granted, or expect it to remain if you choose to ignore it until you have "time" to invest.

A criticizing spouse is one of the key factors in divorce, but self criticism is also detrimental to the health of your marriage. On this episode we take a look at criticism, it's effects, and some tangible steps you can take towards growth in this area. We encourage you to pray and to begin to...

These actions apply to both sides of the coin, and will begin to change your mindset towards yourself and your spouse. Ultimately, we want you to remember to fight FOR each other, and towards resolution, in every hot button topic your marriage faces.

But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for His possession, so that you may proclaim the praises of the One who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light. 1st Peter 2:9

We are so excited to be back for Season 5! We love that you are joining us for this journey, and pray you find this content helps you to grow as an individual and in your marriage.

We have had the amazing opportunity to share our story in many places, but we realized over the summer that we had failed to share it here. We hope, as we relay some of the darkest moments of our life, that you get a glimpse of the WHY behind our ministry...why we do this, why we are passionate about what God can do in marriages, and why we so diligently share hope. Above all, we pray that the path we took either helps you to avoid those steps in the wrong direction, or trust God to heal deep wounds. 

This is Part 1 where Brad shares many of the small choices he made that eventually led him to places he never meant to go. He also shares how God reached him in those dark places, and offered him a choice.

Be sure to follow us so you don't miss next week when you will hear from Lisa for Part 2 of our story of reconciliation. 

We are thrilled to have featured guest, Alison Simmons, on today's episode. There are so so many amazing truths that are revealed as Alison shares her story of betrayal, finding faith, divorce, and how she took her mess with her into her second marriage. 

This is where she shares what God taught her about His design for marriage, leaving room for a gap, and getting uncomfortable living holy...

Be sure to follow Alison's Podcast, social media, and find out more about her available content and courses on her website down below.

We got a question from one of you that inspired this entire episode! We sure love to hear from you guys! 

What does pursuit look like in your relationship? Do you know what pursuit feels like to you, to your spouse, and do you make time for it?

If there has been a breach of trust, are you going into hyper pursuit to really show your spouse that you value them, don't want to lose them, and to make new memories together?

The truth is, the longer you are together, the more intentional your pursuit of one another should be. And this should be fun!! You should want to pursue your spouse. This is the person you get to do life with! Don't waste it by selling for melancholy...go after extraordinary!

Don't miss this frank interview where we get into the details about pornography, the damage it is doing, and the freedom that is possible. On this episode we interviewed Matt Cline who lives in Edmonton with his wife, Louise, and their two young sons. 

He is the director of Restored Ministries, focused on leading men and women out of sexual bondage and into a life of freedom and impact. He is a speaker and coach with the John Maxwell Group and his teachings have had influence in over 65 countries. Formerly, Matt played hockey for Hockey Canada and in the Western Hockey League.

Are you an encourager? Do you give support, confidence, or hope to someone? Have you considered encouragement as coming alongside someone to place courage into them? Today we talk about the impact this has had in our lives, and challenge you to live it out in your own. We also want you to keep in mind that Jesus endured hard things for the joy that lay before Him.....for you and for me!

Hebrews 12:1-3Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. 

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

One doesn't normally associate the word discipline with positive connotations. In fact, typically the first thing that comes to mind is punishment. We want to challenge you on today's episode to look at this through a different lens. In fact, God tells us that He disciplines those He loves. We loves these verses talking about discipline and the benefits it yields.

Hebrews 12:11-13 tells us that, "No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the fruit of peace and righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Therefore strengthen your tired hands and weakened knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be dislocated, but healed instead."

We challenge you to start a discipline, stick with one that you have started, and don't become discouraged. 

Develop the disciplines in your life that take you the direction you want to go. 

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

Have you ever thought of you  and your spouse having a God given purpose? Have you taken the time to think and plan out your vision as a couple? Have you considered living purpose focused instead of problem focused? 

On this episode we talk about becoming Marriage Coaches through Married With a Purpose and what living out vision in our life means to us. We pray it inspires you to dream big and start living into what God has for each and every one of you!

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

We are thrilled to bring you this interview on today's episode. This is a couple that is passionate about helping you enjoy the journey of marriage. They are podcasters, authors, and counselors. Don't miss it as they share some of their story, their ministry, and how God has shown up in both of their lives in incredible ways. Follow them on their Podcast and social media by clicking below.

Did you know that you make on average 35,000 decisions a day?? Those add up to some monumental life altering daily choices. Just as many small steps in the wrong direction can destroy your marriage, we know that many small steps in the right direction can save it. And we want you to start thinking about those small steps, and the direction you are going. On this episode we discuss some little, some not so little, and some major crossroads every person is faced with. They ultimately determine the person you become and the marriage you will have. 

Will you choose this or that...

We encourage you to lean into Jesus' strength and not your own and learn to practice the pause.

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

We live in a culture today that minimizes the value of sex. Everyone is encouraged to follow their heart, do what makes them feel good, and get it all out before getting married. Ultimately, we live in a culture that is practicing for divorce. However, the value of sex can truly be seen in how culture shifts it's perspective on infidelity. In that case, you are told how valuable sex is. We are told that if this ever happens, someone can never change. The lie of "Once a cheater, always a cheater," is a rallying cry. 

We encourage you, please pay attention. Don't devalue something your whole life, only to value it once it has been broken. Don't allow for the small steps in the wrong direction to lead you down roads you never imagined going. 

Protect your sexuality, protect your eyes, protect your marriage bed....because it does matter. And also remember that our God is big enough to cover every mistake that has ever been made. You can lean into Him for healing and for reconciliation. 

Romans 12:1-2 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. 

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

Grief and stress can wreak havoc emotionally and physically. We recently lost our grandfather and on today's episode we discuss what that has looked like for us in the middle of the grieving process. In addition, we talk about what grieving looked like while we walked through infidelity and the divorce process. 

There are several things we want you to remember from this episode.

Remember that grief comes in waves. Allow yourself to experience all that comes with that...and above all, we encourage you to walk that road of healing with Jesus. 

Psalm 9:9 says "The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble."

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

We have rarely been this vulnerable on an episode before, but we want you to know we are committed to being real, honest, and open about our lives. We are walking through a difficult season of letting go of someone we dearly love, and it causes you to look at the brevity of life. It brings into clear focus the things that really matter, and the things that are distracting us from them. We encourage you on this episode to examine your life, your time, your relationship with Christ, and be sure that the dash on your gravestone is filled with beautiful things.

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

We were so thrilled to have special guests, Javier & Shannan Labrador from 24/7 marriage on this episode. They share their story and how they have left everything they have known to be on mission to help marriages. DON'T MISS THIS! They are passionate about restoring hope, redeeming stories, and building stronger marriages. Come and hear their mission and the story that has brought them to where they are today. Be sure to follow them on social media and their Podcast. They also have many resources to help your marriage grow!

Every person experiences seasons where they are running on empty. It's important (whether you are in that season, or before you get there) to ask yourself some important questions to help you navigate. 

The process of what brings life can be different for each person, but we know that no matter what, Jesus will bring you life. He is ready to carry your burdens.

We also know that having someone to share those burdens with (both physically and verbally) matters. 

Learn to create space...both for what drains you, and sustains you. 

Matthew 11:28-30Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

1st Corinthians 13:4-7 gives us a beautiful description of what love truly is... Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

It is easy to look at this verse and see where your spouse has "failed" you in love. However, we want to encourage you to look at this list closely. Take the time to pick out one thing that you know YOU need to work on. Pick the area that sticks out to you the most from these attributes.

Our challenge this week is to take one practical step to begin to work on that area in your life. This doesn't have to be complicated and don't try to work on them all at once. Understand that when we choose to follow Jesus, we are in a sanctification (process of being made holy) our whole faith journey. You won't do any of this perfectly this side of heaven, but we should all want to grow more like Jesus every day. 

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

Have you ever been in a boat or in the ocean and you started drifting but didn’t realize it? Before you know it, you find yourself not going in the right direction or further from shore than you intended.

This same drifting happens in relationships….both with God and your spouse.  We want you to have things in place to help you recognize and to correct when drift happens.

Ways to avoid/recognize drift...

Don't settle for the drift!!! As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

This is a HUGE area that needs to be addressed in YOUR marriage. According to Ameritrade 41% of divorced Gen Xers and 29% of Boomers say they got divorced over money issues!! This isn't something that should be ignored until it creates conflict, but should be worked on frequently, addressed in conversation, and planned out.  

We are on our 4th part in our series on G.R.O.W. The W stands for War. Have you ever thought about the spiritual battle that is being waged around you? Have you ever considered the armor that God wants to equip you with? We do not want you to live your life cowering in fear, or stay on the sidelines living your life passively. We want you to train and we want you to be equipped. Be battle ready...knowing that the Lord will fight for you. We implore you to start recognizing the spiritual battle being waged, and specifically the attack happening on marriages. Consider the attack on YOUR marriage. You have a real enemy who is out to steal, kill, and destroy. Don't stand by and let that happen. Fight for your marriage. Fight for your family. Go to WAR!

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. 11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. 12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. 13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. 14 Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, 15 and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. 16 In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; 17 and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, 18 praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end, keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints,

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts.

We are on the 3rd episode of our 4 part series titled G.R.O.W. If you haven't listened to the previous 2 episodes we encourage you to do so because we want each of you to grow as an individual, and in your marriage!

On this episode we discussed obedience. Obedience is hard for ALL of us! However, God calls us to obey Him, and when we obey Him, He entrusts us with even more. 

1st John 5:3-5 says "For this is what love for God is: to keep His commands. Now His commands are not a burden, because whatever has been born of God conquers the world. This is the victory that has conquered the world: our faith. And who is the one who conquers the world but the one believes that Jesus is the Son of God."

Our challenge this week consists of asking you to step out in obedience to whatever God has called you to. We all have things in our daily life we know we need to do, and some of you need to take a giant leap of faith. Trust that God has a plan and a purpose in each step of obedience He has called you to take...and then OBEY!

As always, we would love to hear from you! DM us on social media, and follow us wherever you listen to Podcasts. 

Have you ever considered that YOU are called to the ministry of reconciliation. That God is making His appeal THROUGH YOU! It is humbling to think that this is a ministry we are all called to, and that we need to seek restoration for ourselves as well. 

We encourage you to walk through whatever is necessary to work on this in your life. We challenge you this week to take that one step, do that one thing, that begins the process to restore something with a person, in an area, or in yourself. 

2 Corinthians 5:18-21

This is the 1st in a 4 part series on how to grow as an individual, in your marriage, and in your relationship with God. We discussed the G. in Grow which stands for gratitude on this episode. If you want to change your life, change your perspective. Shift your attitude to find things to be grateful  for DESPITE your circumstances. Look for opportunities to express gratitude for your spouse, and don't allow yourself to have a critical mindset.

Our challenge this week consists of scripture memorization. 1st Thessalonians 5:16-18 "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." 

James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you my be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

We pray these verses and this topic encourage you as you strive to G.R.O.W.

As always, we would love to hear from you

2022 is fast approaching, and we want to encourage you to approach this New Year differently. So many people set goals that quickly fade as they try to correct or improve something in themselves. We are asking you to shift your mindset from trying to training. Training embodies so much and we should always be in training. It involves setbacks, growth, daily decisions, and injuries. Instead of trying....commit to training. 

Focus on the words of Paul to the Corinthian church in 1st Corinthians 9:24-27, "Do you not know that in a race that all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified."

In addition, pray and ask God for a word that you can focus on for the year that allows you to be purposeful in your training. We wish you a Happy New Year and pray that each of you grows in your relationship with Jesus this next year. 

As always, we would love to hear from you

There is a plethora of advice out there, vast knowledge, and divine wisdom. It is all available, and many people receive that knowledge, but never choose to change because of it. The truth is that you will never change if you never change. 

On this episode we talk about how we need to take what is given to us and apply it, not just hear it. We need to grow instead of being content to stay the same. We need to go to the author of all wisdom and allow Jesus to transform us. We discuss the verses in Hebrew 5:11-14 where it talks about the people being dull of hearing. "For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the basic principles of the oracles of God. You need milk, not solid food. for everyone who lives on milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, since he is a child. But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil."

Don't be satisfied with a shake! Go for the steak!

Merry Christmas! We are so grateful to each of our listeners and pray that you have a beautiful time with your family this season and focus on the true meaning.

As always, we would love to hear from you

We live in a world today that is full of hopelessness, but we don't want you to live that way. Our desire for you is that you have a hope that surpasses all circumstances. Matthew 12:21 tell us this about Jesus, "And His name will be the hope of the world." We want you to have unwavering hope, not in what you can see, but in who He is, and what He can do. 

As Abraham trusted in what God promised, even when he couldn't see how it was possible, we want you to be unwavering. Romans 4:20-21 says "No unbelief made him waver concerning the promise of God, but he grew strong in his faith as he gave glory to God, fully convinced that God was able to do what He had promised."

In this episode, we share our own journey of hope, and how God has showed up in our life over and over and brought hope to hopeless places. Remember, in your own story, that He can do immeasurably more than you can ask or imagine. Lean into the hope of the world.

As always, we would love to hear from you

When we spoke our vows 20 years ago, we had no idea what they meant. We had no idea the immense meaning of "For better or worse, sickness or health, till death do us part." However, those words mean more now because we know what they truly encompass. We know what it means to bear one another up, and we believe this is a big part of marriage and life. We are meant to bear one another's burdens. We are not meant to try and keep everything fair, keep score, or not allow our spouse to help us. Ultimately, we are meant to bring our burdens to Jesus. To cast all our cares on Him. We challenge each of you to reflect on whether you need to help your spouse bear their burdens, let your spouse help bear your burdens, and ultimately if you have handed those burdens to your Heavenly Father.

We also encourage you to get bare as well. It also helps your relationship with your spouse and helps you both to bear one another's burdens. 

As always, we would love to hear from you!

Today is a short episode with a reminder to build your faith. We have been reading through the Bible chronologically and have been reminded repeatedly of all the times that Jesus mentioned faith in the gospels. We are asking God to increase our faith and in turn, we are sharing with you the steps we are doing, and have done, to do just that. 

We hope this episode reminds you that God is working and that you can trust Him with every detail of your life and marriage.

We would love to connect with you!

Discouragement is something each of us faces at some point. We got a review from a listener this week that really impacted us. It reminded us of the “why” behind everything we do, and it reminded us to run with endurance that race that lies before us.  

Hebrews 12:1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. 

We never want to allow discouragement to cause us to give up on what God calls us to, and we don’t want that for any of you either. Who knows how many things we have given up on right before the breakthrough, or never started because we felt someone else was doing it better. How about you?  What are you facing right now that is causing you to experience discouragement and what can you do in that place? Will you allow it to break you or allow it to refine you? 

Maybe you aren't discouraged right now, but you can be used by God to encourage someone that is. We want you to remember, and to know, the God we serve. That He can do immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine. That He wants to give good gifts to His children, and He certainly doesn’t want us to stay in discouragement.

Look to Him no matter what you face and don't allow discouragement to stop you from running your race well. We hope this helps you in your marriage because we want you to thrive and not just survive! 

We would love to connect with you! 

Storms of life will come. We all know this inherently. Most of us have already gone through an abundance of storms that life has thrown at us. If you know they will come, are you preparing in advance? Have you taken the wise advice of Jesus in Matthew 7:24-27 where He tells us to …

Build Your House on the Rock
“Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it.”

In this episode, we discuss how to build your life on the rock, and we give a call to action for those that haven’t made that decision yet. We know what a difference it makes when you have a firm foundation. This doesn’t mean the storms won’t come, or that you won’t be battered and beaten, but that you will still be standing at the end.

In addition to building a firm foundation, we feel that knowing the way your spouse receives love, giving grace, remembering you are on the same team, and having a group of people surrounding you as a support are key elements to weathering whatever may come.

We hope this helps you in your marriage because we want you to thrive and not just survive!

We would love to connect with you!

One of the greatest elements we see in thriving marriages, and those that have successfully navigated healing after a crisis, is the ability to own their part. Over and over we see couples playing the blame game. If it isn't their spouse, they blame other aspects of their past as an excuse for their present behavior. 

The blame game only breeds hurt, and shame, and leads to disrespect.

Before blaming ask yourself these questions...

Take ownership of your part. Take ownership of your thoughts, your behavior, your manipulative tactics. Trust your spouse to God. He can do a much better job than you ever could.

Is there a right way to fight? In this episode, we discuss four different ways that couples tend to handle conflict from the book Vertical Marriage by Dave & Ann Wilson. 

"Win. A winner is usually good at conflict. Winners actually like conflict and are skilled at winning the argument. They bring eyewitness accounts and evidence, complete with full-color pictures, proving they are right."

"Yield. A yielder will "give in" to bring harmony to the relationship. Yielders believe that the marriage is more important than this one, isolated conflict, so they yield to bring peace back to the marriage."

"Withdraw. A withdrawer hates conflict. Withdrawers will do whatever it takes to stay away from conflict. If they can leave the room, consider them gone. But if leaving is not possible, they will shut down emotionally instead. It is very difficult to even engage in conflict. 

"Resolve. A resolver will do whatever it takes to arrive at a resolution. Resolvers can't stand to live life without their conflicts being resolved. It takes a lot of work, but they will roll up their sleeves and get it done in whatever way possible."

Which one do you think you are? Now, what about your spouse? Is your natural tendency in handling conflict helping or hurting your relationship? We challenge you to evaluate this and write down healthy ways you can handle your next conflict. Then DO those things. Now that you are armed with the information, you are not accountable for the information. Who you naturally are is not an excuse for behavior, but an opportunity to grow. 

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Are you in a season that requires patience? Have you ever practiced patience? It is not easy! On this episode, we discuss examples where we have had to practice patience, and what God has taught us in those moments. Sometimes, we have missed opportunities in the middle of the waiting because we have been fixated on what we think should happen, or are so distracted we don't see what is right in front of us. Join us for the discussion.

Verses on episode:

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We are delighted to share this interview with Couples Connect. We loved the questions they asked as it caused us to look at some things we hadn’t really thought about before. 

Curious about our story? 

This is a great place to hear about our journey and how God moves in impossible places. We encourage you to follow this couple on social media and listen to their amazing content!

This is an interview Lisa did with Wren Robbins on Friends of a Feather Podcast. 

Did you know there is such a thing as good stress? Find out on this episode what the difference is between eustress and distress and ways to handle each of them in your life.  

Things like...

Ultimately, we want you to lean into Jesus no matter what life throws your way. Over and over in scripture, we see examples of praise in the middle of, or before, the battle. God wants you to come to Him with all things and He offers us peace despite circumstances. Learn to stand in His truth and He will sustain you through every aspect of your life.

Challenge for the week - What does love require of you? Look at your spouse, family, co-workers, and ask yourself this question. Then...do it!

We want to connect with you! 

Do you struggle with control? Think about it again, do you find yourself fearful or angry? These things can be evidence of a desire to control things in your life. If you don't struggle with control, do you find yourself dealing with passivity? Do you remain disconnected from your faith, marriage, kids, and circumstances? God doesn't call us to live our lives in either of these places. He wants us to live purposed and surrendered lives. We want that for you as well. Come join us for this discussion and don't forget the challenge at the end.

We want to connect with you!

We are thrilled to be back for Season 3 and thrilled that you are a part of our listening family. In this episode, we discuss some of the things we did over the summer and we tackle the question,

"Can you make your spouse cheat?"

Tune in as we discuss our experience with this issue and the many ways you can protect your marriage.

We are also guest speakers at the International Marriage Conference and want to invite you to take part. 

Today we celebrate 20 years of marriage. There was a time in our marriage when we never thought this would be a day we would have a chance to celebrate, and we are beyond grateful to God, who has taken our broken story and done something beautiful. 

We spend this episode answering 20 questions from our dear friend, Ariel Houston, about various stories & advice we have from our marriage. Don't worry, she also throws in plenty of questions for laughs too. Join us for the conversation!

This episode is the end of Season 2 but we are already planning Season 3!! Continue to stay connected with us via social media and don't forget to share an episode with someone you love!

On this episode, we have featured guests from Transformed Couples with us. They share some of their story as a blended family and give advice on how to navigate some of the intricacies of bringing two families together. We are so grateful for the hope they are bringing to so many and their transparency and openness on this topic. Join the conversation!

We had so much fun on this episode and also answered some very deep questions from YOU guys, our listeners! We answered questions such as:

We also answered a few other questions as well! We invite you to join the conversation. 

Be sure to follow us on social media and we would love for you to subscribe to this Podcast. In addition, It would also help us greatly if you take the time to write a 5 star review.

On this episode we did our 1st part in a 2 part series of questions from you guys!

We answered questions like these:

We got very transparent and real in answering these questions and we are looking forward to answering the rest next week! Don't forget to subscribe to this Podcast and CONNECT with us on social media or send us an email.